XPost: soc.genealogy.french, alt.english.usage
A French Book entitled "How to succeed in love" was published in 1830.
If you know the French title, or anything else about it, pls let me know!
The following may be the book I'm looking for.
L'art de faire la cour aux femmes et de s'en faire aimer ou conseils aux hommes pour réussir en amour ... par un ami de Cythère (1837)
........... here is the English translation of the French title L'art de faire la cour aux femmes et de s'en faire aimer ou conseils aux hommes pour réussir en amour ... par un ami de Cythère:
The Art of Courting Women and Making Them Love You
or Advice to Men for Success in Love ... by a Friend of Cythera
Cythera is an island in Greece that was sacred to Aphrodite, the Greek goddess of love and beauty. So, the title suggests that the book is a guide to success in love, written from the perspective of someone who is knowledgeable about the art of seduction.
The book was published in 1837, and its author is unknown. However, the title page indicates that it was written by "un ami de Cythère" (a friend of Cythera), which suggests that the author was a man who was familiar with the island and its association
with love.
The book is divided into two parts. The first part discusses the art of courting women, and the second part offers advice to men on how to make women love them. The book covers a wide range of topics, including:
How to make a good first impression
How to start a conversation
How to flirt
How to compliment a woman
How to ask a woman out on a date
How to kiss a woman
How to propose to a woman
The book is written in a humorous and light-hearted style, and it offers a wealth of practical advice for men who want to be successful in love. However, it is important to remember that the book was written in the 19th century, and some of the advice it
contains may be outdated or offensive to modern readers.
Overall, L'art de faire la cour aux femmes et de s'en faire aimer ou conseils aux hommes pour réussir en amour ... par un ami de Cythère is an interesting and entertaining book that offers a glimpse into the world of love and courtship in the 19th
century.
______________________
Fainting as a deliberate tactic to attract men likely wasn't a widespread or encouraged practice in the 1800s. Here's why:
Social Context: The 1800s, particularly the Victorian era, emphasized propriety and self-control for women. Fainting would be seen as a loss of composure, potentially reflecting poorly on a woman's upbringing and health.
Medical Concerns: Fainting could be a genuine medical concern in the 1800s due to tight-lacing practices and other health issues. A woman who frequently fainted might be perceived as sickly, not desirable.
Alternative Strategies: Women of the 1800s had other ways to attract attention. Social gatherings, accomplishments in the arts or domestic skills, and displays of wit and conversation were more likely encouraged.
However, there are some nuances to consider:
Unintentional Fainting: Fainting due to tight corsets or emotional distress was more common in the 1800s. A woman might unintentionally faint in the presence of a desired man, leading to a situation where she required attention.
Literary Depictions: Fainting as a plot device might appear in some novels of the era, but it wouldn't necessarily reflect real-life practices.
Social Class Differences: Perhaps among certain social circles, a woman might feign illness or weakness to manipulate a situation or gain sympathy from a man. But this wouldn't be a widely recommended approach.
Overall, while fainting might be a trope in some historical fiction, it wasn't a widely used or desirable tactic for women to attract men in the 1800s.
_________________________________ Related to (semi-fake) Fainting
Dropping a handkerchief or gloves for a man to pick up could be a tactic used by women in the 1800s and before, but there are some nuances to consider:
Social Context: It wasn't necessarily a universally accepted or encouraged practice. Here's why:
Refinement: In some social circles, particularly the upper class, women were expected to be demure and avoid overly flirtatious behavior. Dropping something intentionally might be seen as too forward.
Class Differences: This tactic might have been more common among working-class women or in less formal settings. In those situations, it could be a way to initiate casual conversation without directly approaching a man.
Openness to Interaction: More than outright attraction, it could be a way to signal openness to conversation with a man who might be interested. The expectation was that a gentleman would pick up the item and return it, creating a natural opportunity
for interaction.
Accidental Drops: It's important to remember that handkerchiefs and gloves were commonly used items that could be accidentally dropped. A well-mannered gentleman might pick them up regardless of romantic intentions.
Here's a breakdown of how this might play out:
-- Intentional Drop: A woman might strategically drop her handkerchief near a man she found attractive, hoping he'd pick it up and initiate conversation.
-- Accidental Drop: A woman might genuinely drop her handkerchief, and a gentleman nearby would pick it up and return it, leading to a polite exchange.
--- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05
* Origin: fsxNet Usenet Gateway (21:1/5)