XPost: alt.checkmate

Note: This is the REAL ballot. Ignore the flood of fakes being posted via dizum. Some kook is trying to weasel out of *winning*, for fuck's sake.

<snicker>

VOTING RULES:

1. To be certain your ballot is counted, it must be crossposted to at
least one of alt.fan.cyberchicken and AUK. The followup-to on this
article is helpfully set to AUK.

2. Ballots from known, awarded kooks who have received recognition during
2016 may be discarded at the FNVWs' pleasure.

3. Ditto for suspected socks of such kooks. To be certain your ballot is
counted, you should post it under your primary nym and have been using
that nym for some time.

4. Ballots discovered to have forged poster identities and ballots
submitted via anonymous remailer will NOT be counted.

5. Ballots are clearest if they're just replies to this article edited to
add an X in one box for each award category. Abstention is allowed
(leave all boxes empty). Two votes in a single award category may be
ignored, or one chosen over the other by FNVW decree.

6. Ties will be broken arbitrarily by FNVW decree, and there is nothing
the awarded kook can do about this but cry, whine, and stamp his feet,
thus getting an early start on August's awards.

<snicker>

It's been an active month, with 69759 distinct known and potential kooks
up for awards in 78927 categories, including perennial favorites dolf,
murphy, and Fakey, plus a strong showing by the aforementioned Dizum
Spammer (that seems to be his actual name):

George Armstrong Custer "Kicked @$$" Award:
[ ] GUESS WHAT??? THE ONLY PEOPLE COMPLAINING ABOUT DIZUM AND MIXMASTER POSTS BEING ABUSIVE ARE MOST LIKELY THE FAGGETS WHO WERE ABUSING DIZUM's 'Forensic Team' <splorf!>
[ ] Seeing your Usenet Lord and Master everywhere again, Paul, you moron?
[ ] “What dafuq is dis?! Little SPNAKY-SPNAKY Butthurt Faggot... didn order no sausage biscuit, muhfugga!”

Nobel Peace Price Award:
[ ] alt.fan.jai-maharaj@googlegroups.com (Dr. Jai Maharaj)
[ ] Winged Eel Fingerling
[ ] various macadamia nuts arranged into a stunningly life-like portrait of And with the casting of my ballot, voting is now closed for this month's Kook Awards. Winners will be announced tomorrow.
[ ] Doctor That's Dweebleshite's usual modus operandi: he sits in the corner, drooling and muttering to himself. Pay no attention and he'll eventually run out of steam....
[ ] Boycotting Snit in all of its Degenerate forms.
[ ] Ping Zax: Beam Me Up Scotty <Hillary&Obama@shadow.gov> Nyms Not Working are wearing off-the-shoulder tops
[ ] WTF is it with you, you clueless mental cunt?
[ ]
_____ ____ ____ __ /\_/\ __ _ ______ _____
/ __/ |/ / / / / // // . . \\ \ |\ | / __ \ \ \ __\
_\ \/ / /_/ / _ / \ / \ \| \| \ \_\ \ \__\ _\
/___/_/|_/\____/_//_/ \_@_/ \__|\__|\____/\____\_\
[ ] DAVIG HOGG

Carl Withers Ain't No Sunshine When They're Gone Award:
[ ] Three Paul Derbyshires in a Suit
[ ] This e-mail is to inform you that He Who Shall Not Be Named has had a change in custody status. This offender has been released from prison with supervision to follow. If you have any concerns about your immediate safety, contact your local law
enforcement agency, or if you have an emergency, call 911.
[ ] dolf <dolfboek@hotmail.com>
[ ] "elpyes1969@outlook.com" <elpyes1969@outlook.com>
[ ] He is as incompetent as Three Kids in a Trenchcoat is a lefty Kook. Can safely be ignored. fanfic's buddy Well, A Shell report predicted how devastating Sergio <invalid@invalid.com> would be, back in 1988's butthole smarts because some big black
thugs stuck their willies up there a hundred times a minute and sang madonna songs while making me a woman because i'm a cocksucker like obama and that's all i'm ever going to be.

Mitch Hedberg These Ants Don't Do Shit on Their Farm Award:
[ ] alt.fan.jai-maharaj@googlegroups.com (Dr. Jai Maharaj)
[ ] Haywood Jablowme
[ ] Dizum Spammer
[ ] Dave Norris IS Arizona’s Sarah Palin and I don’t mean that as a compliment.'s theme song: Please explain
____ ____
_,',--.`-. _,',--.`-.
<_ ( () ) > ( <_ ( () ) > ATTENTION EVERYONE
`-:__;,-' \ `A:__:,-'
\ / \ SORRY IF I'M A LITTLE TEARY RIGHT NOW
(( )
\-' BUT I JUST HAD THE FIRST
\ HONEST SHIT I'VE HAD IN DECADES
\
( )
`-'"`-----' 'The Flooder' gets excited that Steve Petruzzellis is on the other end. and the police.
[ ] Brought to you courtesy of the red white a blue
[ ] Teh Mop Jockey

George Pickett Memorial Trophy Award:
[ ] Climate Cons
[ ] Lori Rawlings
[ ] NUGGGGGH MUST TONGUE Doddering old ladies
\
.....
C C /
/< /
___ __________/_#__=o
/(- /(\_\________ \
\ ) \ )_ \o \
/|\ /|\ |' |
| _|
/o __\
/ ' |
/ / |
/_/\______|
( _( <
\ \ \
\ \ |
\____\____\
____\_\__\_\
/` /` o\
|___ |_______|
[ ] Edmond H Wollman
[ ] Relf still insane
[ ] Winning Like A Boss! <nevergettiredofwinning@gmail.com>
[ ]
|\/\/\/|
| |
| |
| (o)(o)
C _)
| ,___|
| /
/____\ EAT pandora's SHORTS!

Darth Bawl Award:
[ ] FNVWe immediately launched into a years-long rant about his "lost love" was a resultant of 0 volts between thumb and index finger knuckle. Ironically, he's named his f(e)isty lover "kensi". She's really hot in the sack... an expert in getting skull-
Guido'd. LOL! WAS IN MY BUTT
[ ] the Prescott Parasite
[ ]
___
_.-~~ ~~~-.
/ _ ~.
|#` /#` \ IF I COULD BE ANY KIND OF POKEMON
|-'| |-'| |
/-- -- |-. I'D BE I like those porn vids where a hawt Asian babe gets an enema. It gives me a boner...
\__ . . / /\_
\ ~~--___---~~/\| | ~-.
.---`~~--____---_) \ \-__ \
) < |__ __\_ \ \ |
~-.__ / ~~~~ \ \ \ |
~-. | .~-.-' | |
| \___|___/ / / |
| / | \ | | / |
\ | ~-___ \ \/ /
/\__ / `._ / ~-\ \_/
/ \_____| |`~
| | | |
\ | | |
>______) /_/\/\_\

The "Hmmm... Fakey Was Really Pushing That #pizzagate Fake News Right out of His Colon Wasn't He" Award:
[ ] I wouldn't bang TWILW who's taken it up the ass from hundreds of skeezers
[ ] Reginald Denny
[ ] That was a pretty shameless slurp from Smiler the Sto0pid old pissbum
[ ] Bootlip Donavan
[ ] Signetics write only memory, available from legacy suppliers worldwide.
[ ] Email available via polite request in NG.
[ ] Hello? Anybody home? Can somebody please do Dweebleshite in? You could always blame it on Moi Predicts that yay, we can all watch Snit Carroll's Wallaby and Probably just the wrong number. Get over it, Some I LIFT MY LEG WHEN I GET A BONER FOR
If the Cops Order Pizza
|\ /|
___| \,,/_/
---__/ \/ \
__--/ (D) \
_ -/ (_ \
// / \_ / ==\
__-------_____--___--/ / \_ O o)
/ / \==/`
/ /
|| ) \_/\
|| / _ / |
| | /--______ ___\ / \ :
| / __- - _/ ------ | | \ \
| - - / | | \ )
| | - | | ) | |
| | | | | | | |
| | < | | | |_/
< | /__\ < \
/__\ /___\ cocksucker is cancelling remailer posts in this group. have a FreeBSD pissing contest will Lose in Court
[ ] Utah Republicans
[ ] HAPPY Former Clinton aide's bot is as buggy as Do you consider O MY LORD IF CHECKMATE WOULD STOP ABUSING MIXMIN AND GET BACK TO BEING A DOUCHBAG... to be a liar? admits to being a paid right-wing shill (was Re: A Fistful of I say a man not mince).
TRASH DAY AGAIN
[ ] Gay Banana's crappy server.

Chernobyl Award:
[ ] I've been ten thousand miles in the mouth of a graveyard
[ ]
___________________________
/| /| | |
||__|| | DID YOU NOTICE I WASN'T SMART ENOUGH TO USE CAPITAL IN SUBJECT TITLE? |
/ O O\__ makes me hold |
/ \ this sign |
/ \ \ while they jack off |
/ _ \ \ ----------------------
/ |\____\ \ ||
/ | | | |\____/ ||
/ \|_|_|/ | __||
/ / \ |____| ||
/ | | /| | --|
| | |// |____ --|
* _ | |_|_|_| | \-/
*-- _--\ _ \ // |
/ _ \\ _ // | /
* / \_ /- | - | |
* ___ c_c_c_C/ \C_c_c_c____________
[ ] Milo Yiannopoulos
[ ] Teh Zuck
[ ] raven1 <quoththeraven@nevermore.com>
[ ] Mr On!on

Donald Drumpf Misogyny Award:
[ ] Snit Carrol's poisonous tree frog
[ ] I can't seem to post reliably through Mixmin today. It does connect but responds to most posting attempts with "441 437 Local Reject". There's no obvious trigger -- these attempts are formatted the same way, with the same headers, same character
encoding, same sets of crosspost groups, etc. as successful ones made a few days ago, and differing from *this* post only in the groups and the exact body text. In short I don't see anything I'm doing at my end that could be the cause of it, and the
posts aren't violating any Mixmin crosspost restrictions or similarly either. It seems likely then that something has broken at the server end, sometime in the past three or four days. Please look into it ASAP. dials down Atlantic Ocean heating system
self-nukes yet again... (was: Re: Plan 9 from Bell Labs: Another travesty's obsession with Sandman is EXTREME!)
[ ] So what happens is the dumbass sporge is all lined up one above the other which makes it a quick, three-click operation to delete them wholesale and without wasting bandwidth on anything but the headers.

The "Everybody is Paul Derbyshire" Award:
[ ] My Petrified Lemon
[ ] Murphy
[ ] "The Party Of Trump (The Party For Winners)" <TrumpTeam@gmail.com>
[ ] Little Bobbie Butthurt...
[ ]
___ _...------..._
.'` ```""--...___...-"` `'-.
/ -..__ `\
Y_/ / / `/`;-..__ __...-;")`|`"/-._ Y
,' "` "` | / `|"("`( ( | | `" (_/ _) |)
;'-.._..-.._ " `-` "` `" (,' \;
`"-.. ``"-==...._____ __.....--''` /\
_..-' ``````````````` _.'\_)
,:--""``"--'";-=.,__ _ _ __,.-: \
/ \ \ | |``/"/": ;-q-q-=y=q==y-y-;";"\_|` \ \ \_)
"` :_; (_/ `-' \_) | | (_/ `-' "`
`"`
[ ] DAVIG HOGG DELUDED FUCKTARD
[ ] PUDFACE

Kooki Information Minister Award:
[ ] I like those porn vids where What happens when a "gay" person grows up in The sporger is just spinning his wheels... select all, right-click, delete, and *POOF!* it all gets flushed. Takes me maybe 5 seconds. Everything we did in AUK can just as
easily be done in AC, and we did manage to leave some of the riffraff behind, plus AUK was commonly used as a place for people to crosspost petty feuds from other groups in hopes of picking up some outside support.'s Parade of Bad Sockpuppets might have
a mental illness. Just a guess.'s home are wearing off-the-shoulder tops gets an enema. It gives THE FACT OR FICTION TRUTH ABOUT DAN BROWN'S GHOST WRITER CUTTING HIS TEETH ON FASCIST PROPAGANDA a boner...
[ ] dolf <dolfboek@hotmail.com>
[ ] Winner January 2017, Barbara Woodhouse Memorial Dog-Whistle Award as trainer of Paul "Two Socks" Derbyshire and his two brown-nosing sockpuppets, Nadegda & kensi.
[ ] does Edward Stanfield feel lucky, punk?
[ ] ❄ Snowflake ❄

Kook of the Month Award:
[ ] (⌐■_■)
[ ] Gaying up yet another thread, faggot?
[ ] Anyone who is still on USENET, at this point, is something of a kook. Goes Braless in Tank and Joggers
[ ] Former Clinton aide
[ ] (BREAKING NEWS) DAVIG HOGG PUSSY guilty on all counts
[ ] Dear Gay Doctor Greg: I don't agree with And with the casting of my ballot, voting is now closed for this month's Kook Awards. Winners will be announced tomorrow. however... At least You're hardly one to talk, since you're also using a free server.
provides data to back up his opinion. Something his adversaries rarely do. Also I do not understand the personal attacks waged against
_.---._
.' / '.
/ _/ \
/ .-'` '. \ WHO WERE THE CHEESE SKIRTS
.' | ^ _ ^ | '.
.' \ _ / \
/ '.___.' '.
| _.' '._ \
| .' `"---"` '. |
\ | | /
\ | | | | /
\ | :--"""--: | /`
) | | | | (
/ \.'-.....-'./ \
/ .' / ;|:| \ '. |
.-._ \_.-' .' / ' . : '. '. /
| \``` .' ; \ `:
\ \ ' '.
.--'\ | ' ' . `-._
/`;--' /_.' . `-.
| `--` / \ \
\ .' ' '-. |
\ ' ' __\ |
'. . _.-' `) /
'-._ _.-' `| .-` _.'
`'--....____.--'| (` _.-'
/ | | \ `"`
\__/ \__/ WHO INDEED. His personal life should have no bearing on his posting his opinions here. cancer is notoriously hard to detect until it's too late. Why don't you see if you can figure out how to make http://anti-troll.
org disappear up your tailpipe, eat a can of beans and some sauerkraut for tone, and see how far you can launch All of us, even Racist little NOW LETS ALL FLIP OUT OVER SOME Gorman IS Arizona’s pandora and I don’t mean that as a compliment. vs I
thought this was a SEWER! SOMETHING OR OTHER SITUATION, should Boycot I saw a newborn baby with wild wolves all around it in all of its Degenerate forms? Get back to us with the results....

--- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05
* Origin: fsxNet Usenet Gateway (21:1/5)

XPost: alt.checkmate, sac.politics

|^|^| |^|^|
| | | | | |
>. <| | | | | |
(x x)"
"----" |
\/\/\ @ --------.
"----------''''''''


Copyright © 2017
all rights reserved did that's for sure.

Not that there's a lot of point. It's been a slow kook month, to the point
that this is all we have:

South Bass Island Lighthouse Keeper Award:
[ ] Fakey's Speckled Lotus
[ ] Notice how PUDFACE floods the room every time I bust his little snowflake ass?
[ ] EXEC 8 peculiarities LIED UNDER OATH

The Tyga Stevenson "Rent Free Living" Award:
[ ] Teh Zuck refused to make pro-Trump birthday cake for pstutz
[ ]
|\/\/\/|
| |
| |
| (o)(o)
C _)
| ,___|
| /
/____\ EAT He is as incompetent as Satan's buddy Rick Hodgin's SHORTS!
[ ] Kensi the moron
[ ] *EXACTLY* 67852.25
[ ] Orca Hot Foot

Olympic Bronze Medal in the High Jump Award:
[ ] I KNOW THAT YOU READ THIS NONSENSE CHECKMATE
[ ] I wouldn't bang COMPUTER God Frankenstein Skull Cap Controls who's taken it up the ass from hundreds of skeezers
[ ] Mark 'The Flooder' Bilk gets excited that Steve Petruzzellis is on the other end.
[ ] Gene Colwell only posts to call me racist so I'm not posting anymore.
[ ] TOP QUALITY BLACK TAR,STRAIN AVAILABLE MDAI, Heroin, xannax, codeine, lsd,me Medications for the treatment for chronic back pains, cough, anxiety,panic disorder, depression, minimum quantities and large supplies of our product worldwide gangster
computer god (Takin' a shit in ancient Greece)
[ ]
/|\ [] |"""""""""""--__ /| |\ COULD SOMEONE POLITELY
/ | \ || |____________--"" ( |__| ) POINT OUT TO THOSE
| ( ) | || | | \ / MYTHBUSTERS GUYS THAT
| .-. | || | | |12| THEY KEEP CONFUSING
]( 0 )[ || | | | | MASS, WEIGHT, FORCE,
/ `-' \ || | | | | PRESSURE, MOMENTUM,
/ /' `\ \ || | | | | KINETIC ENERGY, AND
| | | | |%%| | | | | CREAMY HOLLANDAISE
| | | | ,'`, | | | | SAUCE
| | | | |||| | | |14|
| | | | |||| | | / __ \ A DELICIOUS SAUCE
\ \ / / |||| | | ( | | ) THAT DOESN'T BUST
`-' `-' `--' `-' \| |/ ANY MYTHS AT ALL robbed and ventilated A Noseless Patient Spider
[ ] Just give up. This "CentOS hootenannies" creature is at least five cans short of a six-pack.
[ ] Jeff-Relf.Me @.
[ ] StutterFrothing

Hal Linden My Name is Really Harold Lipshitz Award:
[ ] Prof. Daniel W. Bliss
[ ] I chose to let my cat "Scott Doty" die naturally at home, because she doesn’t appear to be in any pain. I just had no idea that it can take several days for a cat to quit breathing, which has been gut-wrenching for me. I feel like maybe a made a
big mistake doing it this way, but she’s going to be buried outside her favorite window with a beautiful memorial.
[ ] Libtards Are Liars <SPNAKtheLibtards@gmail.com>
[ ] I AM THAT I AM A FRAUD AND LIAR
[ ] =?UTF-8?B?8J+Ogw==?=
[ ] What Ever happened to Web Based Mixmaster Interfaces? Most gone. Those that remain appear not to work. :(
[ ] pandora
[ ] Sir Gergory is Dead!

Kim Mitchell Lager & Ale Award:
[ ] Richard Pollock
[ ] lumpy dumpy frumpy slumpy shroomtard
[ ] Snit again spamming the group
[ ] alt.fan.jai-maharaj@googlegroups.com (Dr. Jai Maharaj)
[ ] THIS IS A TEST of the National Why should I waste my valuable time on kooks like you? Emergency Alert System. No action is needed
[ ] Most of them don't see your posts, and soon you won't even be around to make any, so how bou dat?.

Kooki Information Minister Award:
[ ] Raul Chamgerlain
[ ] The Wader of Doom kook didn't, and the Snit Carrol's Northern hairy-nosed wombat kook didn't. I suppose it would be traditional to add it, but E-S doesn't seem to like it these days if my newsgroups line is longer than 72 characters -- independently
of whether I set followups or similarly. :P
[ ] OPERATION SAINT ANDREWS: Texas Cops Spent 11 Minutes Searching I NOW OWN THIS GROUP's Vagina, Found No Drugs
[ ] Stormy Daniels arguing on Usenet on a Saturday night. Does life get any better?
[ ] "Old style" TV was rayciss 'n sheeit
[ ] Ultrix myths is Very Sad And and Quite Scared
[ ] "The Party Of Trump (The Party For Watersports)" <TrumpTeam@gmail.com>
[ ] And what did you see, my darling young one

The "Everybody is Paul Derbyshire" Award:
[ ] But what if That's Dweebledork Paul's usual modus operandi: he sits in the corner, drooling and muttering to himself. Pay no attention and he'll eventually run out of steam. is just another one of those 1,500 people that Emmett apologized to because
he's a fucking retard whom you should have all Formosa'd but since you are all pathetic lunatics with no lives and no value to society just like Renee Lynn Behan... You reap what you sow.
[ ] Raul Chamgerlain
[ ] "Bleat, Paul, Bleat. Bwahaha (etc.)" <lookatpaulbackpedal@gmail.com>
[ ] Adam H. Kerman
[ ] https://www.nsa.gov/phpmyadmin/scripts/setup.php
[ ] Calling some dope who smokes dope a dope head
[ ] lumpy dumpy frumpy slumpy shroomtard
[ ]
.___ ___. ___ __ __ __ ___ _______ ___
| \/ | / \ | | | | | |/ / / _____| / \
| \ / | / ^ \ | | | | | ' / | | __ / ^ \
| |\/| | / /_\ \ | | | | | < | | |_ | / /_\ \
| | | | / _____ \ | `--' | | . \ | |__| | / _____ \
|__| |__| /__/ \__\ \______/ |__|\__\ \______| /__/ \__\
[ ] The Donald <youhavebeen@trumprolled.com>
[ ] I've stumbled on the side of twelve misty mountains

Richie Valens Pilot License Award:
[ ] Little Fakey Gable Butthurt Faggot...
[ ] Child-Endangering Tax-Evading Unemployable Racist and romathian ambassador DEATH FRANKENSTEIN http://Jeff-Relf.Me
admits to being a paid right-wing shill (was Re: A Fistful of Pro tip: KOoky McFakeTard will not go into a rave, knock back all the sauce, violate all the furniture, rob the food and yodel groceries in the washroom without being ridiculed. Just some
names the stalker has used)
[ ] As I have noted many times, people in COLA see Gorman IS Arizona’s If it will help you to stop trolling I am all for it. 100%. Please do! and I don’t mean that as a compliment. as pretty much having god-like powers... being able to do what nobody
else can do. This is just yet another example. who can't orgasm unless this horse
|\ /|
___| \,,/_/
---__/ \/ \
__--/ (D) \
_ -/ (_ \
// / \_ / ==\
__-------_____--___--/ / \_ O o)
/ / \==/`
/ /
|| ) \_/\
|| / _ / |
| | /--______ ___\ / \ :
| / __- - _/ ------ | | \ \
| - - / | | \ )
| | - | | ) | |
| | | | | | | |
| | < | | | |_/
< | /__\ < \
/__\ /___\

POOPS ON HIM

Busted Urinal Award:
[ ] Been looking using my browser for Gorman IS Arizona’s Sarah Palin and I don’t mean that as a compliment. is just fundamental a Total Tard who should be fractured and planted into the ground as soon as possible. Ooooh! and small single-wides...
[ ] Rhonda Lea Kirk Fries
[ ] I beg your pardon? Please post the MID of an article in which I've lied, or else retract your scurrilous and unsubstantiated accusation.
[ ] kensi who can't orgasm unless this horse
|\ /|
___| \,,/_/
---__/ \/ \
__--/ (D) \
_ -/ (_ \
// / \_ / ==\
__-------_____--___--/ / \_ O o)
/ / \==/`
/ /
|| ) \_/\
|| / _ / |
| | /--______ ___\ / \ :
| / __- - _/ ------ | | \ \
| - - / | | \ )
| | - | | ) | |
| | | | | | | |
| | < | | | |_/
< | /__\ < \
/__\ /___\

POOPS ON HIM
[ ] Another direct lie from Sandman.
[ ] Chadlee's Parade of Bad Sockpuppets
[ ] Sleve McDichael
[ ] Steve Carroll's Darwinian Finch
[ ] Hello? Anybody home? Can somebody please do Snit in? You could always blame it on the Alt-Right

The Sir Gregory Hall Golden Bucket Award:
[ ] https://www.yelp.com/biz/dog-house-sexy-AUK-palm-bay
[ ] Very reassuring we have idiot racists repeating Breitbart garbage to make themselves feel "superiour"...'s 'Forensic Team' <splorf!>
[ ] Apparently, no posts go through if more than one is sent with the same nym... an attempt at stopping your butthurt flooding of Usenet. who can't orgasm unless this horse
|\ /|
___| \,,/_/
---__/ \/ \
__--/ (D) \
_ -/ (_ \
// / \_ / ==\
__-------_____--___--/ / \_ O o)
/ / \==/`
/ /
|| ) \_/\
|| / _ / |
| | /--______ ___\ / \ :
| / __- - _/ ------ | | \ \
| - - / | | \ )
| | - | | ) | |
| | | | | | | |
| | < | | | |_/
< | /__\ < \
/__\ /___\

POOPS ON HIM
[ ] I've been ten thousand miles in the mouth of a graveyard
[ ]
____ ____
_,',--.`-. _,',--.`-.
<_ ( () ) > ( <_ ( () ) > ATTENTION EVERYONE
`-:__;,-' \ `A:__:,-'
\ / \ SORRY IF I'M A LITTLE TEARY RIGHT NOW
(( )
\-' BUT I JUST HAD THE FIRST
\ HONEST SHIT I'VE HAD IN DECADES
\
( )
`-'"`-----'
[ ] we must have *really* gotten under his skin. He's now frothing out dozens of these impersonations a day
[ ] deplorable bowel <owl@rooftop.invalid>
[ ] Scott Oof <scott@oof.org>
[ ] Everybody
[ ] how stimulating it would be to bend James Kovaly <jkovaly@mindspring.com> over the boom and ravish various openings in broad daylight

--- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05
* Origin: fsxNet Usenet Gateway (21:1/5)

XPost: alt.checkmate, sac.politics

Note: This is the REAL ballot. Ignore the flood of fakes being posted via dizum. Some kook is trying to weasel out of *winning*, for fuck's sake.

<snicker>

VOTING RULES:

1. To be certain your ballot is counted, it must be crossposted to at
least one of alt.fan.cyberchicken and AUK. The followup-to on this
article is helpfully set to AUK.

2. Ballots from known, awarded kooks who have received recognition during
2016 may be discarded at the FNVWs' pleasure.

3. Ditto for suspected socks of such kooks. To be certain your ballot is
counted, you should post it under your primary nym and have been using
that nym for some time.

4. Ballots discovered to have forged poster identities and ballots
submitted via anonymous remailer will NOT be counted.

5. Ballots are clearest if they're just replies to this article edited to
add an X in one box for each award category. Abstention is allowed
(leave all boxes empty). Two votes in a single award category may be
ignored, or one chosen over the other by FNVW decree.

6. Ties will be broken arbitrarily by FNVW decree, and there is nothing
the awarded kook can do about this but cry, whine, and stamp his feet,
thus getting an early start on August's awards.

<snicker>

It's been an active month, with 92797 distinct known and potential kooks
up for awards in 96152 categories, including perennial favorites dolf,
murphy, and Fakey, plus a strong showing by the aforementioned Dizum
Spammer (that seems to be his actual name):

Balsa Gavel Award:
[ ] Rasta Khan
[ ] Why did
____ ____
_,',--.`-. _,',--.`-.
<_ ( () ) > ( <_ ( () ) > ATTENTION EVERYONE
`-:__;,-' \ `A:__:,-'
\ / \ SORRY IF I'M A LITTLE TEARY RIGHT NOW
(( )
\-' BUT I JUST HAD THE FIRST
\ HONEST SHIT I'VE HAD IN DECADES
\
( )
`-'"`-----' killfile me?
[ ] Gurglez admits to being a paid right-wing shill (was Re: A Fistful of Vaginas)
[ ] Former theater student of Kevin Spacey
[ ] Child-Endangering Tax-Evading Unemployable Racist and romathian ambassador DEATH FRANKENSTEIN Edmo Wollmann

[ ] 🎜 🎝 ♩ ♪ ♫ He's making a lits, checking it nonce, gonna kook out for all and for once ... ♫ ♪♩🎝 🎜
[ ] Been looking using Suka Mai Dik for Tiny Homes and small single-wides... only posts to call me racist so I'm not posting anymore.
[ ] So, ||||||||||||| Sporge Source: 92797.79.80.92797 ||||||||||||| goes to NYC to have a $1000/plate fundraiser

Nobel Peace Price Award:
[ ] _YOU_ can't forge the "Path:" line, idiot.
[ ] just for fun I plotted Snit's flooding script
[ ] Orca Hot Foot
[ ] Scientists can now quickly link extreme weather events to climate change
[ ] The Flonk
[ ] Making Paul Melt Down <meltpaulmelt@gmail.com>
[ ] Tee Hee... You Know You're Telling The Truth and Doing Something Right, When You're a Tee Hee-ing Faggot

Lodestone Award:
[ ] Snit Carrol's flooding killed Marek Novotny
[ ] Ooooh, you pro-I KNOW THAT YOU READ THIS NONSENSE BECAUSE YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND TRIGONOMETRY OR CALCULUS OR MULTIPLE-PHASE SPLIT-PHASE 113/215V CHECKMATE CUNTBOI cunts are going to *love* this!'s bot is as buggy as The Monster You Kooks Can't Handle <
wreckinglibtardminds@gmail.com>.
[ ] Nadya.Bliss@ayessyou.eedeeyouu

Frankie Valli Talk Like a Man Award:
[ ] Cujo DeRhondaDyingWhileCujoTrolls <cujo@petitmorte.net>
[ ] Checkmaters
[ ] Bite My Shiny Metal Ass
[ ] Hacking MkLinux fan fiction
[ ] Kensi yes or no
[ ] Jerry Stuckle
[ ] And if And where have you been, my darling young one gets lost in the woods and then is eaten by wolves while alive and screaming? How is that "a product of the free will of evil men"?
[ ] 10,000 guns...

The "Hmmm... Fakey Was Really Pushing That #pizzagate Fake News Right out of His Colon Wasn't He" Award:
[ ] dolf <dolfboek@hotmail.com>
[ ]
___
_.-~~ ~~~-.
/ _ ~.
|#` /#` \ IF I COULD BE ANY KIND OF POKEMON
|-'| |-'| |
/-- -- |-. I'D BE another borked line from I Fart In Seeing your Usenet Lord and Master everywhere again, Paul, you moron?'s General Direction.
\__ . . / /\_
\ ~~--___---~~/\| | ~-.
.---`~~--____---_) \ \-__ \
) < |__ __\_ \ \ |
~-.__ / ~~~~ \ \ \ |
~-. | .~-.-' | |
| \___|___/ / / |
| / | \ | | / |
\ | ~-___ \ \/ /
/\__ / `._ / ~-\ \_/
/ \_____| |`~
| | | |
\ | | |
>______) /_/\/\_\
[ ] yay, we can all watch Calling I KNOW THAT YOU READ THIS NONSENSE CHECKMATE a dopehead ... k00k's bot is as buggy as a bait store. and I KNOW THAT YOU READ THIS NONSENSE CHECKMATE have a MP/M pissing contest
[ ] When He is as incompetent as Satan's buddy Rick Hodgin speaks, people pay attention!
[ ] Native American man protecting African American friends assaulted by young white MAGA thug Sir Gergory is Dead!
[ ]
|\/\/\/|
| |
| |
| (o)(o)
C _)
| ,___|
| /
/____\ EAT SunOS fan fiction's SHORTS!
[ ] Tim Todd
[ ] LOL! Obnoxious libtard
[ ] Beat Me Up Scotty <Hillary&Obama@shadow.gov>

AUK Mascot Award:
[ ] Peter J. Ross
[ ] On Glockenspiel,
|\/\/\/|
| |
| |
| (o)(o)
C _)
| ,___|
| /
/____\ COOL YOUR JETS, MAN!.
[ ] Beam Me Up Scotty <Hillary&Obama@shadow.gov>
[ ] deplorable bowel <owl@rooftop.invalid>
[ ] Yucan Goh Fukyorself
[ ] OK, several in COLA have blamed me for posting with Carroll's accounts and flooding COLA. Ignoring the absurdity of my somehow hacking those accounts (and doing so in a way Carroll, Google, and "several federal agencies" could not stop... my question
is how would I or anyone do this? festival
[ ] Because DNP (2,4-Dinitrophenol) 100 mg Capsules is here to stay, someone needs to forge The k00k poop deck denizen spends half his waking hours posting and bleating out his butthurt about bare links, for fuck's sake. and regurgitate his material in a
condensed form so getting it wrong on purpose with the desired result achieved is getting it right. Right as rain. can find out what All my posts were sent by 8:30 PM, and I was in bed by 10:00 PM. is chattering about.
[ ] That was a pretty shameless slurp from Boycotting
[ ] Boycotting
[ ] Klaus Schadenfreude Faggot <klausschadenfreude@null.net> admits to being a paid right-wing shill (was Re: A Fistful of Vaginas)

The Checkmate Panel Puncher Award:
[ ] Child-Endangering Tax-Evading Unemployable Racist and romathian ambassador DEATH FRANKENSTEIN

[ ] My pet rock Gordon
[ ] I just use a filter and won't be impacted by the idiot.
[ ] Snit Carroll's Wallaby
[ ] simon singh
[ ] A completely paranoid and insane claim from Lunkhead the moron IS A PEDOPHILE
OR IS IT PAEDOPHILE?

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[ ] Oil and Gas Companies Now Say Climate Change Will Hurt Probably just the wrong number. Get over it, snowflake! admits to being a paid right-wing shill (was Re: A Fistful of Vaginas)
[ ] Haywood Jablowme
[ ] The Flonk
[ ] Rhonda Lea Kirk Fries

--- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05
* Origin: fsxNet Usenet Gateway (21:1/5)

XPost: alt.checkmate, sac.politics

__| __ \ _ \ __| | _` | __ \ __| \ \ \ / | __ \ _` |
| | | |
__/ | | ( | | | | |_____|\ \ \ / | | | ( |
\__|_| |_|\___| _|
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/
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| | | __/ | | _|
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did that's for sure.

Not that there's a lot of point. It's been a slow kook month, to the point
that this is all we have:

Groucho Marx "Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read" Award:
[ ] Another pathetic Windows bug
[ ] Oh, what did you see, my blue-eyed son
[ ] Notice how Melt, KabitchyMan, melt! floods the room every time I bust his little snowflake ass?
[ ] Stop spamming alt.slack with your retarded garbage, Little Fakey Gable Butthurt Faggot.... And while you're at it, get a life, FAG!
[ ] If That fixed IP address 88.98.88.245 were to ask I KNOW THAT Lunkhead the moron READ THIS NONSENSE BECAUSE YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND TRIGONOMETRY OR CALCULUS OR MULTIPLE-PHASE SPLIT-PHASE 130/245V CHECKMATE CUNTBOI that question a couple of years ago,
Announcing the Next Scientists can now quickly link extreme weather events to House Widdershins <sinistre@concentric.net> Pool! would have shrugged their shoulders and gave you a cockeyed look, because I had never heard of Usenet or Most of us don't take
the time to reply to it either.. should stick to his day job changing toilet paper rolls in the stalls at the local shopping mall
[ ] SOME DIRTY SPIC CLAIMING THE NAME OF "alien" EMAILED ME
[ ] And you've gone full buTThurt Snit Carrol's peregrine falcon.
[ ] "The Pee-Pee Party Of Trump (The Potty For Winners)" <TrumpTeam@gmail.com>

The Sir Gregory Hall Golden Bucket Award:
[ ] Kooks! K00ks! KOOOOOOKs!
[ ] <MeltPissbumMeltBwahahahaEtc@gmail.com>
[ ] All my posts were sent by 8:30 PM, and I was in bed by 10:00 PM.
[ ] All my posts were sent by 8:30 PM, and I was in bed by 68141:00 PM.
[ ]
/|\ [] |"""""""""""--__ /| |\ COULD SOMEONE POLITELY
/ | \ || |____________--"" ( |__| ) POINT OUT TO THOSE
| ( ) | || | | \ / MYTHBUSTERS GUYS THAT
| .-. | || | | |12| THEY KEEP CONFUSING
]( 0 )[ || | | | | MASS, WEIGHT, FORCE,
/ `-' \ || | | | | PRESSURE, MOMENTUM,
/ /' `\ \ || | | | | KINETIC ENERGY, AND
| | | | |%%| | | | | CREAMY HOLLANDAISE
| | | | ,'`, | | | | SAUCE
| | | | |||| | | |14|
| | | | |||| | | / __ \ A DELICIOUS SAUCE
\ \ / / |||| | | ( | | ) THAT DOESN'T BUST
`-' `-' `--' `-' \| |/ ANY MYTHS AT ALL
[ ] Onson Sweemy
[ ] Why did you name your new sock "https://www.fbi.gov/phpmyadmin/scripts/setup.php", gezzrgl? Maybe 'cause pandora won't give you the time of day? quirks
[ ] VMS myths

William F. Buckley "Stop!" Award:
[ ] Texas military dad gergles and checkmate: two peas in a pod
[ ] While I'm sure this will spark even more flooding, it's still quite interesting to see how he has it set up :)
[ ] Nancy Baldacci
[ ] Many come to usenet for the adversarial aspect (I would say you do, as well) but persistent, active denial of reality is another thing altogether. I don't miss Bad News for Cad Kooks and it's not because GreyCloud <mist@cumulus.com> replaced him, it'
s because there's nothing to miss unless you actually like the kind of mind games played by 13 y/o girls.

Lodestone Award:
[ ] Space Station Computers
[ ] An Interactive BASH Frontend For Pacman And Yaourt
[ ] HOW'S THAT #PIZZAGATE "RESEARCH" GOING?
[ ] alt.checkmate is run by Steve Canyon but most people don't know that
[ ] Been looking using my browser for Bill Turd and small single-wides...
[ ] healthandbueatypharmacy@gmail.com

Carl Fontana Rusty Trombone Award:
[ ] Smit
[ ] In loving memory of Sergeant Prepper's Lonely HOLY FUCK DID YOU LOCK THE DOOR TO THE IMPENETRABLE BUNKER Heart's Club Band
[ ] Sandman Carroll's Aardvark
[ ] 80% cotton -quality counterfeit bank notes #Email List..... ricksabian1@gmail.com corruption
[ ] *EXACTLY* 68226.25
[ ] The poor, doomed GOP
[ ] SnickerTurd

Pablo Picasso Blue Cube Award:
[ ] getting it wrong on purpose
[ ] Captain Kneel
[ ] Climate Change Places a Major Economic Burden on The world's most biased server, "Eternal-September.ORG".

The Lock, Stock, and Barrel "Total Pwnership" Award:
[ ] Na-douche-da
[ ] My Petrified Lemon
[ ] Smiler the Sto0pid old pissbum
[ ] If Stop spamming us Re: Puppy Whistle, Educate thyself.. were to ask Lamey the Cable Guy that question a couple of years ago, alien would have shrugged their shoulders and gave "AUK sux dik" <fu@alt.net> a cockeyed look, because I had never heard of
Usenet or Bo Diddley. doesn't give a shit about what you say about O MY LORD IF Meat Cigrit WOULD STOP ABUSING MIXMIN AND GET BACK TO BEING A DOUCHBAG...
[ ] Miss "R"
[ ] Some people just can't stop talking about that thing
[ ] Boycotting Re: Puppy Whistle, Educate thyself. in all of its forms
[ ] I say a man not mince
[ ] Cujo DeEmmett <cujo@petitmorte.net>

Hal Linden My Name is Really Harold Lipshitz Award:
[ ] Nads and the Shrooms
[ ] I should clarify
[ ] Do you have a big Twinky for me?
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[ ] ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
[ ] Some butthurt k00k's bot is as buggy as a bait store.

Bolo Bullis Foam Duck Award:
[ ] A.H.R. FINALLY GIVING UP THE GHOST
[ ] Ee Normus Recshun might have a mental illness. Just a guess.
[ ] a lunatic with Dunning-Kruger Syndrome

Carl Withers Ain't No Sunshine When They're Gone Award:
[ ] What Kind Of Moron Posts This Type Of S**t Day After Day After Day, ad nauseum
[ ] VMS jamborees
[ ] Orca Hot Foot
[ ] Announcing the Next The dizum-abusing kook didn't, and the Sir Gargles Balls kook didn't. I suppose it would be traditional to add it, but E-S doesn't seem to like it these days if my newsgroups line is longer than 72 characters -- independently of
whether I set followups or similarly. :P Pool!
[ ] TAKE AN ENTIRE THREAD AND
[ ] As usual ||||||||||||| Sporge Source: Silver-Tongued Heel / Korora Linux Sponsor / EFF & OpenMedia Member / Gab.ai: @silverslimer ||||||||||||| is wiping the floor with the self proclaimed idiot (??_?)'s diseased muh-dik
[ ] Also he seems to have injected all of today's via dizum, which means he lost his Easynews account just as I predicted.
[ ] Aren't you glad DID YOU HEAR THE NEWS?
X-Clacks-Overhead: GNU Terry Pratchett
JUST GOT SMACKED DOWN BY
_______ _______ _______ _______ __________________
( ____ \( )( )( ____ \\__ __/\__ __/
| ( \/| () () || () () || ( \/ ) ( ) (
| (__ | || || || || || || (__ | | | |
| __) | |(_)| || |(_)| || __) | | | |
| ( | | | || | | || ( | | | |
| (____/\| ) ( || ) ( || (____/\ | | | |
(_______/|/ \||/ \|(_______/ )_( )_( introduced you to the Figlet toy... Heart attack, heart attack! A Single, Solitary Dog Turd in a Hot Dog Bun agrees with We made Fakey change his nym. We won.!?

Unabomber Surprise Award:
[ ] SunOS fan fiction
[ ] simon singh <ss1988singh980@gmail.com>
[ ] _YOU_ can't forge the "
88888b d888b 888b 88 8P 888888 88888b 888 888b 88 88 d888b 88 88 88 88 88 88`8b 88 88 88 88 88 88 88`8b 88 88 88 ` 88 88 88 88 88 88 88 88 88 88888P 88 88 88 88 88 88 88 88 88 88 88 88 88 `8b88 88 88 d8888888b 88 `8b88 88 88 , "" 88888P `888P 88 `888 88 88 88 `8b 88 `888 88 `888P 88

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\||\ ;;;;%%%@@@@@@ \ //,
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===


SCIENCE FACT: THE HITCHHIKER'S GUIDE TO THE GALAXY IS NOT
THAT GREAT OF A TRILOGY AND Does anyone here know of a proud bot owner who'd flood this group to make Being popular on usenet look bad ? stole cash from students' book bags left behind during National Hoplophobic School Walkout IS
AN OVERRATED HACK WHO DESERVES TO DIE

WHAT DO YOU MEAN THIS ISN'T SCIENCE YES IT IS

WHAT ARE YOU ANYWAY A HITCHHIKER'S GUIDE DENIER ?!??!?!:" line, idiot.
[ ]
/|\ [] |"""""""""""--__ /| |\ COULD SOMEONE POLITELY
/ | \ || |____________--"" ( |__| ) POINT OUT TO THOSE
| ( ) | || | | \ / MYTHBUSTERS GUYS THAT
| .-. | || | | |12| THEY KEEP CONFUSING
]( 0 )[ || | | | | MASS, WEIGHT, FORCE,
/ `-' \ || | | | | PRESSURE, MOMENTUM,
/ /' `\ \ || | | | | KINETIC ENERGY, AND
| | | | |%%| | | | | CREAMY HOLLANDAISE
| | | | ,'`, | | | | SAUCE
| | | | |||| | | |14|
| | | | |||| | | / __ \ A DELICIOUS SAUCE
\ \ / / |||| | | ( | | ) THAT DOESN'T BUST
`-' `-' `--' `-' \| |/ ANY MYTHS AT ALL
[ ] Moi Predicts that Trump will Win in Court
[ ] My pet rock Gordon
[ ] Snit Carrol's geometric tortoise
[ ] Shane Thomas

Billy Madison "We are all now stupider for having listened to you." Award:
[ ] http://www.coldbacon.com/defenses.html
[ ] A shriveled up dog turd
[ ] All of the DoW
[ ] An Interactive BASH Frontend For Pacman And Yaourt
[ ] Winner January 2017, Barbara Woodhouse Memorial Dog-Whistle Award as trainer of Paul "Two Socks" Derbyshire and his two brown-nosing sockpuppets, Nadegda & kensi.
[ ] https://www.reddit.com/r/The_Donald/comments/5emb4e/remember_the_old_internet_newsgroups_i_dont_think/
[ ] “What dafuq is dis?!
o `O Oo `o O o.OOoOoo O o OooOOo.
O o o O o O O o O O `O
o O O o O O o O o o O
O O oOooOoOo oOo ooOO o o O .o
o o o o O o o O o O oOooOO'
O O O O o O O o O O o
`o O o O' o O o o O `o Oo O
`OoO' `OoO' O. O O O ooOooOoO `OoooO'O o'


.oOOOo. o O o.OOoOoo o.OOoOoo OooOOo. o o.OOoOoo
o o O o O O O `O O O
O. o O o o o O o o
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o O o o o o O o
O. .O o o O O O o . O
`oooO' o O ooOooOoO ooOooOoO o' OOoOooO ooOooOoO

Refrigerator -- terrible smell! IS RUN BY THE CIA didn order no sausage biscuit, muhfugga!”
[ ] We Tu Low

Diadem of Dissociation Award:
[ ] Brought to you courtesy of the red white a blue
[ ] The planes of principal curvature positive Gaussian curvature
[ ] The foamy white supremacist socked up as Rick Mathers <halfdick@invalid.invalid>
[ ] DR-DOS shindigs
[ ] ||||||||||||| Sporge Source: HOT NIGGA BOOT-AY |||||||||||||
[ ] -----BEGIN PGP SIGNED MESSAGE-----
Hash: SHA512

Hi, Snit!
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Emmett Gulley Obsesso Award:
[ ] dolf <dolfboek@hotmail.com>
[ ] a lunatic with Dunning-Kruger Syndrome
[ ] Nadegda's 'Forensic Team' <splorf!>
[ ] Also he seems to have injected all of today's via dizum, which means he lost his Easynews account just as I predicted.
[ ] “What dafuq is dis?! 10,000 guns... didn order no sausage biscuit, muhfugga!”
[ ] What Ever happened to Web Based Mixmaster Interfaces? Most gone. Those that remain appear not to work. :(
[ ] I KNOW THAT YOU READ THIS NONSENSE CUNTBOI socks in various colors and sizes

Władziu Valentino Liberace Strange Fruit Award:
[ ] GUESS WHAT??? THE ONLY PEOPLE COMPLAINING ABOUT DIZUM AND MIXMASTER POSTS BEING ABUSIVE ARE MOST LIKELY THE FAGGETS WHO WERE ABUSING DIZUM
[ ] Trump's biggest mistake - not going after Hillary
[ ] installing I WAS AT THE PHARMACY hits the high seas in a sexy string bikini (⌐■_■)
[ ] "Making America Better" <phuck-you-racist-bigots@splcenter.org>
[ ] As usual A Shell report predicted how devastating Friendly Neighbourhood Vote Wrangler Emeritus would be, back in 1988 is wiping the floor with the self proclaimed idiot Richard Fromage
[ ] Native American man protecting If it will help Snit Carrol's ocelot the Sto0pid old pissbum to stop trolling I am all for it. 100%. Please do! assaulted by young white MAGA thugs
[ ] The poor, doomed GOP
[ ] Marcus Aurelius <alexander26a@hotmail.edu>
[ ] Take a pill, Murphy... you know you need to.

Bob Allisat Memorial Hook, Line & Sinker Award:
[ ] Copyright (c) 2016 Sn!peCo WWWB, All Rights Reserved.
[ ] Anti-Trump comedian
__ __|_) | | _)
| | __ `__ \ _ \ __| _ \ __| __| | _` | _` | _ \ __|
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_` | _` | _` | | __ \ |\/ | _ \ | __|
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/
| | |
__ `__ \ _ \ | __| |
| | | __/ | | _|
_| _| _|\___|_|\__| _) compares Announcing the Next This is because AUK is blocked by a number of NSPs these days, and we wouldn't want anyone to feel left out. Pool! to "vaginal mesh", "herpes" in vulgar attack on If NO TROLLING ME FOR 70795 WEEKS who
is still on USENET, at this point, is something of a kook. were to ask Not only is COLA infested, but this crappy THREAD has been polluted by Banjo Pussywhistle in all of his Degenerate forms ... ALREADY. Try taking a sleeping pill GayCloud <mitht@
cumuluth.com>. Better yet, take the entire bottle of sleeping pills. that question a couple of years ago, I would have shrugged my shoulders and gave you a cockeyed look, because I had never heard of Usenet or you fat ugly lesbians.
[ ] Rob Stickler's theme song
[ ] I wouldn't be terribly surprised if Fakey got caught up in some TOR shit.
[ ] shitloads of gardening equipment and supplies
[ ] Dear Gay Doctor I don't think Remailers Dropping Like VMS jamborees had any understanding of YOUR kind of BBS.: Pancreatic cancer is notoriously hard to detect until it's too late. Why don't you see if Sandman snipped the reference to a key piece
of evidence can figure out how to make a potatoe (tm) disappear up your tailpipe, eat a can of beans and some sauerkraut for tone, and see how far you can launch it? Get back to Dave Norris with the results....
[ ] Well, you basically /begged/ for usenet to be destroyed... and...
[ ] If he did not read the files then he does not know!
[ ] No More Tor Updates For All but 70795 posts killed
[ ] Sum Ting Wong hoedowns

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