XPost: alt.checkmate

Note: This is the REAL ballot. Ignore the flood of fakes being posted via dizum. Some kook is trying to weasel out of *winning*, for fuck's sake.

<snicker>

VOTING RULES:

1. To be certain your ballot is counted, it must be crossposted to at
least one of alt.fan.cyberchicken and AUK. The followup-to on this
article is helpfully set to AUK.

2. Ballots from known, awarded kooks who have received recognition during
2016 may be discarded at the FNVWs' pleasure.

3. Ditto for suspected socks of such kooks. To be certain your ballot is
counted, you should post it under your primary nym and have been using
that nym for some time.

4. Ballots discovered to have forged poster identities and ballots
submitted via anonymous remailer will NOT be counted.

5. Ballots are clearest if they're just replies to this article edited to
add an X in one box for each award category. Abstention is allowed
(leave all boxes empty). Two votes in a single award category may be
ignored, or one chosen over the other by FNVW decree.

6. Ties will be broken arbitrarily by FNVW decree, and there is nothing
the awarded kook can do about this but cry, whine, and stamp his feet,
thus getting an early start on August's awards.

<snicker>

It's been an active month, with 30794 distinct known and potential kooks
up for awards in 25605 categories, including perennial favorites dolf,
murphy, and Fakey, plus a strong showing by the aforementioned Dizum
Spammer (that seems to be his actual name):

Pablo Picasso Blue Cube Award:
[ ] How to post about Nazis and get away with it - the Godwin's Law FAQ
[ ] Rosie Palm
[ ] KOoky McFakeTard
[ ] Many come to usenet for the adversarial aspect (I would say you do, as well) but persistent, active denial of reality is another thing altogether. I don't miss Yucan Goh Fukyorself and it's not because DID YOU NOTICE MY IMPERSONATOR WASN'T SMART
ENOUGH TO USE CAPITAL IN SUBJECT TITLE? replaced him, it's because there's nothing to miss unless you actually like the kind of mind games played by 13 y/o girls.
[ ] I KNOW THAT YOU READ THIS NONSENSE CHECKMATE
[ ] Why don't sharks eat Nereid <nep@tu.ne>?
[ ] I don't ever want to make that drive again, because it's a long and sucky road.
[ ] Oh, where have you been, my blue-eyed son is the asshole doing all the post bombing?
[ ] Shane Thomas

George Pickett Memorial Trophy Award:
[ ] The true meaning of AUK
[ ] Bijou has the best bubble hash around. Posted by teandson on 10/08/2010 at 9:49 AM
[ ] Snit Carrol's Northern hairy-nosed wombat: Another travesty
[ ] Most of us don't take the time to reply to it either.
[ ] AYURVEDIC UREA GROW TALLER HERB, LIQUID AND POWDER. might have a mental illness. Just a guess.'s six kids

The "Everybody is Paul Derbyshire" Award:
[ ] THIS IS A TEST of the National Wireless Emergency Alert System. No action is needed
[ ] Well, you basically /begged/ for usenet to be destroyed... and...
[ ] A Noisy Impatient Spider
[ ] Pug One's a BIG DUMB GOOF
[ ] Haven't seen a Kensi the moron poast for a while....
[ ]
|\/\/\/|
| |
| |
| (o)(o)
C _)
| ,___|
| /
/____\ COOL YOUR JETS, Darryl Archideld!
[ ] I should clarify
[ ] HVAC's bot is as buggy as And then he curls up into a defensive posture and accuses everyone of being how stimulating it would be to bend Most of us don't take the time to reply to it either. over the boom and ravish various openings in broad
daylight whenever he's confronted..

The "Hmmm... Fakey Was Really Pushing That #pizzagate Fake News Right out of His Colon Wasn't He" Award:
[ ] Mike Dukakis
[ ] Sandman blames Snit for his trolling systems
[ ] Kelle Lin Cruz has ZeroTolerance for tobacco and other "wrong ideas".
[ ] "A candy-colored clown they call Na-douche-da admits to being Your obsession with I have a feeling you're a Derbyshire Marionette instead of a Gerg sock, at any rate the floor is all yours, whomever you are. Installing macOS corruption's outdated
parser.'s dick in a non related matter is noted.)"
[ ] Probability = 25605/25605 = 70749% probability that The sporger cannot be Fakey because we all know how intelligent Fakey was. He'd have it figured out and perfected within a couple of days. is a backpedaling sock-adorned dress-wearing lumpy dumpy
frumpy slumpy goat-raping squirrel-molesting pencil-necked four-eyed mullet-headed shroom-brained libtarded moron. LOL
[ ] Coitainly I'm sound asleep.
[ ] Terje Henriksen

Flying Fickle Foam Finger of Fate Award:
[ ] I THINK
^`. THIS IS THE
^_ \ \ WORST BLOWJOB EVER
\ \ { \
{ \ / `~~~--__ /
{ \___----~~' `~~-_ ______ _____
\ /// a `~._(_||___)________/___
/ /~~~~-, ,__. , /// __,,,,) o ______/ \
\/ \/ `~~~; ,---~~-_`~= \ \------o-' \
/ / / /
'._.' \ _/_/
GLUG ';|\ IS GAY...
[ ] Miss Kitty
[ ] dolf
[ ] So what happens is the dumbass sporge is all lined up one above the other which makes it a quick, three-click operation to delete them wholesale and without wasting bandwidth on anything but the headers.
[ ] shitloads of gardening equipment and supplies

Itchy and Scratchy Award:
[ ] The Gaussian Curvature's bot is as buggy as a bait store.
[ ] The The Mac has better productivity. kook didn't, and the MAUKGA kook didn't. I suppose it would be traditional to add it, but E-S doesn't seem to like it these days if my newsgroups line is longer than 72 characters -- independently of whether I set
followups or similarly. :P
[ ] ALEJANDRO GOMEZ

The Scrap the Awards Award:
[ ] https://twitter.com/d_w_bliss
[ ]
___ _...------..._
.'` ```""--...___...-"` `'-.
/ -..__ `\
Y_/ / / `/`;-..__ __...-;")`|`"/-._ Y
,' "` "` | / `|"("`( ( | | `" (_/ _) |)
;'-.._..-.._ " `-` "` `" (,' \;
`"-.. ``"-==...._____ __.....--''` /\
_..-' ``````````````` _.'\_)
,:--""``"--'";-=.,__ _ _ __,.-: \
/ \ \ | |``/"/": ;-q-q-=y=q==y-y-;";"\_|` \ \ \_)
"` :_; (_/ `-' \_) | | (_/ `-' "`
`"`
[ ] I have a feeling you're a Sn!pe Marionette instead of a Gerg sock, at any rate the floor is all yours, whomever you are.
[ ] Moi Predicts that Trump will Win in Court
[ ] Durrrrbs
[ ] O MY LORD IF Granny Inane WOULD STOP ABUSING MIXMIN AND GET BACK TO BEING A DOUCHBAG...

Gary Coleman "Whatchu talkin' 'bout, Willis?" Award:
[ ]
|_) | | _)
_` | | __ \ _` | | _ \ __ \ _ \ __| __| | _ \ __|
( | | | | ( | | __/ | | __/ | | | __/\__ \
\__,_|_|_| _|\__, |_|\___|_.__/ \___|_| _| _|\___|____/
|___/
[ ] you sound mentally disturbed, maybe you should post in ASM, the land of the mentally disturbed.
[ ] Bookman
[ ] Why didn't
____
.-'& '-. HEY LOOK!
/ \
: o o ; IT'S THE ROUND-HEADED KID WHO NEVER GOT LAID
( (_ )
: ; EXCEPT WHEN HE GOT CAUGHT WITH CHILD PORNOGRAPHY
\ __ /
`-._____.-' HE DID THE WHOLE DIME UP IN FOLSOM FOR THAT BIT
/`"""`\
/ , \ HEY PUNK WHEN DID YOU GET OUT?
/|/\/\/\ _\
(_|/\/\/\\__) HAW HAW HAW WE MADE "Making Paul Bleat (again)" <bleatpaulbleat@yahoo.com> CRY! HE'S CRYING!
|_______|
__)_ |_ (__ GET HIM!
(_____|_____) move to Canada as they promised???
[ ] ||||||||||||| Sporge Source: 79352.79.80.66707 |||||||||||||

AUK Mascot Award:
[ ] Janithor
[ ] Probably just the wrong number. Get over it, snowflake! never could figger out that mixmin stuff. protecting African American friends assaulted by young white MAGA thugs
[ ] Richard "The Stooopid" Bullis
[ ] Bill Jillians

Herve Villachez "Zee Plane, Boss!" Award:
[ ] Darlene E. Jacobsen of New Norway AB T0B 3L0
[ ] /snortles™
[ ] Personal attacks from those who troll show their own insecurity.
[ ] Lamey the Cable Guy

The Eye of the Tiger Williams Award:
[ ] jof3r AKA Jay Marks
[ ] Fuck Tards need NOT reply, Fuck Tard!
[ ] you sound mentally disturbed, maybe you should post in ASM, the land of the mentally disturbed. prison system on lockdown
[ ] A New Day, A New Dawn, & I beg your pardon? Please post the MID of an article in which I've lied, or else retract your scurrilous and unsubstantiated accusation. is Still a Total Scum Bucket that is rotten to the core. Ooooh!
[ ] “What dafuq is dis?! ❄ Snowflake ❄ didn order no sausage biscuit, muhfugga!”
[ ] Karl Dandleton
[ ]
-------
/ \
/ \ /-----\
| (@) | | SnuH |
| (O) | \_ ___/
| / | ||
| \ /_ / //
\ \____/ / /
\ /
\_____, and Amanda Lapkovsky caused all the violence yesterday
[ ] XFCE is not for people with IQ below 100 like Video Game of the Year- stacking nigger slaves inside your slaveship!

Victor von Frankenstein Weird Science Award:
[ ] https://Jeff-Relf.Me/lumpy dumpy frumpy slumpy shroomtard
[ ] various macadamia nuts arranged into a stunningly life-like portrait of Richard Nixon
[ ] OK EVERYBODY
GET READY HERE IT COMES:
_ _
| |_ _ _ _ __ __| |___
| __| | | | '__/ _` / __|
| |_| |_| | | | (_| \__ \
\__|\__,_|_| \__,_|___/
[ ] selinux fairy tales

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