• At the Costco Doctor

    From a425couple@21:1/5 to Joe on Tue Aug 29 14:01:05 2017

    The Costco Doctor
    « on: July 18, 2017, 12:18:11 am »
    One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Joe says to Mike behind him,
    "My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I'd better see a doctor."

    "Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike replies. >"There's a diagnostic computer down at Costco. Just give it a urine
    sample and the computer will tell you what's wrong and what to do about >it. It takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars - A lot cheaper than a >doctor."

    So, Joe deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to
    Costco. He
    deposits ten dollars and the computer lights up and asks for the urine >sample.... He pours the sample into the slot and waits...

    Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout: "You have tennis
    elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy activity.... It will >improve in two weeks. Thank you for shopping @ Costco!"

    That evening, while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Joe >began wondering if the computer could be fooled.

    He mixed some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples
    from
    his wife and daughter, and a sperm sample from himself for good measure.

    Joe hurries back to Costco, eager to check the results. He deposits ten >dollars, pours in his concoction, and awaits the results.

    The computer prints the following:
    1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. (Aisle 9)
    2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. (Aisle 7)
    3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab.
    4. Your wife is pregnant. Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer.
    5. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get >better!

    Thank you for shopping @ Costco!

    --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05
    * Origin: fsxNet Usenet Gateway (21:1/5)
  • From Brian G@21:1/5 to a425couple@hotmail.com on Wed Sep 6 08:59:51 2017
    Thank goodness we don't have costco over here.
    Brian

    --

    -----
    Mildew_spores@blueyonder.co.uk is the alter ego of
    Brian G.
    Please note I am not a sexual predator or an axe murderer,
    and despite some of the fantasies I may write,
    I am only interested in consensual activities
    and role playing, so please no insults,
    as they will be ignored!:-)
    "a425couple" <a425couple@hotmail.com> wrote in message news:oo4kme0l2l@news4.newsguy.com...

    The Costco Doctor
    « on: July 18, 2017, 12:18:11 am »
    One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Joe says to Mike behind him,
    "My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I'd better see a doctor."

    "Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike replies. >"There's a diagnostic computer down at Costco. Just give it a urine >sample and the computer will tell you what's wrong and what to do about >it. It takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars - A lot cheaper than a >doctor."

    So, Joe deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to
    Costco. He
    deposits ten dollars and the computer lights up and asks for the urine >sample.... He pours the sample into the slot and waits...

    Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout: "You have tennis >elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy activity.... It will >improve in two weeks. Thank you for shopping @ Costco!"

    That evening, while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Joe >began wondering if the computer could be fooled.

    He mixed some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples
    from
    his wife and daughter, and a sperm sample from himself for good
    measure.

    Joe hurries back to Costco, eager to check the results. He deposits ten >dollars, pours in his concoction, and awaits the results.

    The computer prints the following:
    1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. (Aisle 9)
    2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. (Aisle 7) >3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab.
    4. Your wife is pregnant. Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer.
    5. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get >better!

    Thank you for shopping @ Costco!

    --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05
    * Origin: fsxNet Usenet Gateway (21:1/5)