Now, please don't take this the wrong way and get all indignant .... cos Aussies n Yanks have been side by side Blowing shit up for ages...

Besides

You've got a permanent military base in Darwin, (We don't usually give those things away)and fuck knows who is in Pine Gap ?CIA/ NSA? (we trust you enough to let you not tell us shit!!)

How and importantly : why the fuck after 20 years did you let the mother fucking, Freedom-Hating Taliban win?


The HOW is easy:
they Just had to wait til you got distracted and started blueing (https://www.slang.com.au/b/blue/)
with each other again.
To be truthful, besides a very few exceptions You're pretty shit at winning wars....
War of Independence- It was against the poms - everyone kicks their butt (except Argentina)....
WW2 was a tag team affair,
and you rocked up late!
So no bragging rights there.

Korea hasn't finished, the French suckered you into taking over their losing Vietnam War; and you gave the South Vietnamese a masterclass in "How to cut and run 101"and what happens when a government says No to playing your war games but remain neutral
...
- Kampuchea was the Switzerland of IndoChina - So, as a parting gift; a decent sprinkle of rumours from the US Coup Whispering Corps and an unhelpful government is ousted - and little known opposition party The Khmer Rouge eternally grateful for American
Hubris.
But I digress.....
Ho Chi Minh kicked your butts whilst wearing sandals made from discarded
rubber tyres donated by the US army -

nb: I am pretty sure that the "clothing the enemy" tactic has been phased out.

So, then there were Sandinistas and central America - Oops, no..
that was another clandestine meddling campaign aka "we won't do anything meaningful about the problems in our country so we'll just see how we can fuck yours up instead", " No need to ask, we work best uninvited"

We didn't have to get "sand up our cracks" courtesy of Gulf War One .... cos early July, HW n Saddam were tight "Yes, S.H. that sucks your neighbours thieve your oil but I'm staying out of it -" You should see the jokers i've got north and South"

We all know, don't do a Break & Enter with the next-door Royal neighbours; they are way too well connected, they don't really like us -... and ooze self entitlement.
Wisdom that wasn't shared with the very unroyal, unconnected and unpopular, Saddam - or that a "promise isn't a promise " if they had their fingers crossed (like HWs mighta been)
Cos even if they stole from you, royal blood is thicker than oil and for those of of us without royal blood - oil is thicker than water so there was fuck all chance of getting his stuff back - cos we all had heaps of water.



Yes - that makes a second war win,
I think ... sorta. Maybe not.
Sorry you left the bully in charge.

Then 9/11, and Georgie Porgy just needed to keep reading to the kids and focus that limited IQ on getting Bin Laden out of Tora Bora....
But No, i need Daddy's attention and prove that i'm better than Jebby, Jebby, Jeb Jeb and get Saddam.

. So that's the WHY the Taliban won because
they were playing the long game against George Dubya!
(plus if it was my home,
i'd just hang around til the interlopers left)

i didn't include the Civil war cos once again you were fighting amongst yourselves and there are no winners when you do that.
Also, as a disclaimer- for historical accuracy i relied on memory not wikipedia so if there is a discrepancy-
be sure to tell Wikipedia they are wrong !!!!

America is your great County and Win/Win is always possible when you all
work together.
The world needs America back on top -
and
Australia wants our mates along side us cos we got China and Russia in the crosshairs.

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