• (from NCIS!) name for those who've lost children?

    From J. P. Gilliver@21:1/5 to All on Wed Jan 31 07:51:24 2024
    XPost: soc.genealogy

    (Came up in a recent [in UK] repeat of NCIS!)

    We have a term for those who've lost parents: orphan. (The majority of
    us become one of those.)

    We have a term for those who've lost a partner: widow or widower.

    But we don't have a term for those who've lost child(ren) - I was going
    to say a common term, but I'm not aware of _any_ term.


    I suppose it's the case that in the past (i. e. when such terms were
    being created), people had a lot more children. But it's still an
    interesting point.
    --
    J. P. Gilliver. UMRA: 1960/<1985 MB++G()AL-IS-Ch++(p)Ar@T+H+Sh0!:`)DNAf

    The smallest minority on earth is the individual. Those who deny individual rights cannot claim to be defenders of minorities. - Ayn Rand, quoted by Deb Shinder 2012-3-30

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  • From john@21:1/5 to All on Thu Feb 1 08:48:53 2024
    XPost: soc.genealogy

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  • From JMB99@21:1/5 to J. P. Gilliver on Thu Feb 1 09:05:15 2024
    On 31/01/2024 07:51, J. P. Gilliver wrote:
    But we don't have a term for those who've lost child(ren) - I was going
    to say a common term, but I'm not aware of _any_ term.



    Try asking @susie_dent

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  • From J. P. Gilliver@21:1/5 to john on Thu Feb 1 09:25:40 2024
    XPost: soc.genealogy

    In message <upfid6$1vjqq$1@dont-email.me> at Thu, 1 Feb 2024 08:48:53,
    john <john1@s145802280.onlinehome.fr> writes
    On 31/01/2024 08:51, J. P. Gilliver wrote:
    []
    But we don't have a term for those who've lost child(ren) - I was
    going to say a common term, but I'm not aware of _any_ term.
    I suppose it's the case that in the past (i. e. when such terms
    were
    being created), people had a lot more children. But it's still an >>interesting point.

    Not only in English but in other languages (and no Shakespearean words
    no longer used).

    Chinese apparently has one for those who've lost their only child -
    though it wasn't clear (from the second discussion below) whether it was
    a noun or an adjective.

    A couple of discussions from the many found from an internet search:

    https://english.stackexchange.com/questions/62469/word-for-grieving-parents

    https://www.reddit.com/r/EnglishLearning/comments/14vh299/is_there_a_wor >d_for_a_parent_whos_lost_a_child/?rdt=38046

    Thanks! Seems it's a common source of discussion, though I get the
    impression those discussions are general, or language, or specifically
    bereaved parents (the best phrase, I think, as it's clear what it
    means), rather than genealogists specifically.

    You need to expand some of the reddit comments which includes:
    In recent days, this word is gaining acceptance and is building a
    community around itself. The term “Vilomah” describes a parent who has >lost their child.

    Apparently it's Sanskrit for "against the natural order" (because
    parents aren't expected to outlive their child); although that could
    mean many things, I guess it's OK to bring it into English to have this specific meaning: English has lots of words and phrases that don't mean,
    in English, what they did in their original (some mean the opposite!).
    Though this one hadn't reached me (i. e. I'd never heard of it), and I'm
    fairly into both language and genealogy, so it has a way to go.

    Life has its natural order, and in that order, children are supposed to >outlive their parents. "Vilomah” comes from Sanskrit, which means >“against the natural order.” Sanskrit is one of the oldest languages
    that dates back to 400 B.C. The same language gave us the word “widow,” >signifying “empty.” There are times English cannot capture the true

    I didn't know that origin. Probably cognate with the French "vide".

    essence of a word. The term “vilomah” is a powerful yet straightforward >word that captures the pain and turmoil that a parent faces in this >situation.

    I wasn't after something that "captures the pain and turmoil", just a
    straight factual word. Though I suppose widow(er) and orphan still _do_
    have an element of sadness about them, in many places (rather than just
    legal and genealogy). Other than "merry widow" of course!
    --
    J. P. Gilliver. UMRA: 1960/<1985 MB++G()AL-IS-Ch++(p)Ar@T+H+Sh0!:`)DNAf

    The squeamish will squeam a lot.
    (Barry Norman on the film "300", in Radio Times 30 March-5 April 2013.)

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  • From Colin Bignell@21:1/5 to J. P. Gilliver on Thu Feb 1 13:31:05 2024
    XPost: soc.genealogy

    On 31/01/2024 07:51, J. P. Gilliver wrote:
    (Came up in a recent [in UK] repeat of NCIS!)

    We have a term for those who've lost parents: orphan. (The majority of
    us become one of those.)

    We have a term for those who've lost a partner: widow or widower.

    But we don't have a term for those who've lost child(ren) - I was going
    to say a common term, but I'm not aware of _any_ term.


    Looking at how many children failed to survive into adulthood in my
    family tree, I think the term is parent.


    I suppose it's the case that in the past (i. e. when such terms were
    being created), people had a lot more children. But it's still an
    interesting point.

    --
    Colin Bignell

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  • From J. P. Gilliver@21:1/5 to Colin Bignell on Thu Feb 1 14:06:43 2024
    XPost: soc.genealogy

    In message <z5mdnX5dnMKEASb4nZ2dnZeNn_idnZ2d@giganews.com> at Thu, 1 Feb
    2024 13:31:05, Colin Bignell <cpb@bignellREMOVETHIS.me.uk> writes
    On 31/01/2024 07:51, J. P. Gilliver wrote:
    (Came up in a recent [in UK] repeat of NCIS!)
    We have a term for those who've lost parents: orphan. (The majority
    of us become one of those.)
    We have a term for those who've lost a partner: widow or widower.
    But we don't have a term for those who've lost child(ren) - I was
    going to say a common term, but I'm not aware of _any_ term.


    Looking at how many children failed to survive into adulthood in my
    family tree, I think the term is parent.

    I suppose it's the case that in the past (i. e. when such terms were >>being created), people had a lot more children. But it's still an >>interesting point.

    Others have pointed that out, in the discussions another here kindly
    found; with the suggestion that there might once have been almost a need
    for those none of whose children predeceased them. Though "lucky" would
    do.

    Nowadays it's different though - especially in China for some decades in
    the late 20C, where government policy was to encourage only one child,
    which may be why Chinese apparently _does_ have a word.
    --
    J. P. Gilliver. UMRA: 1960/<1985 MB++G()AL-IS-Ch++(p)Ar@T+H+Sh0!:`)DNAf

    The first banjo solo I played was actually just a series of mistakes. In fact it was all the mistakes I knew at the time. - Tim Dowling, RT2015/6/20-26

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