This is a hard post for me to make, I have been really down the last few weeks. I mean really down, words cannot describe it. I know I have been beyond silly on a few posts and argumentative at times, as others have been too, but this is from thebottom of my heart and a lot of stuff here is hard to say. Why am I doing this? Not for sympathy, not for attention, but there are a few things I need to say, it is therapeutic for me to say them and maybe something here will inspire you. And I am doing
I always thought of myself as being invinceable, I think a lot of us do, but I have had some recent health issues that have been beyond scary to me. I have not worked since Thanksgiving week and probably will not return for another month. I am ondisability for the first time in my life. I have been scared and deeply depressed. I have had several panic attacks. If you never had one, well just imagine waking up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat, heart pounding, and you feel like all is
Being away from work and being idle a lot, I have had time to reflect on a few things. First, I realized my own mortality, and really what a short time we have here. So many people close to us have died recently. Some it was expected, some it was not.Every day really is a blessing, talking to a friend the other day, he said that "We are all time bombs". That time bomb could be cancer, a stroke, a heart attack, a car wreck, being hit by lightening, it could be anything. You really never know what is
With all this time to reflect, I realize that I have generally been a good person in this life, but flawed in many ways like all of us. I have generally been kind and caring, but at times not so much. I keep so busy, I mean really busy, it masks a lotof underlying depression I have, and I have come to grips with it. I had an awful upbringing, and a fair amount of hurt and disappointment in my life, and maybe did not process it as well as I should. I think we all have some degrees of mental health
I am lucky to be married to an amazing lady. We will be together 29 years next month. I think overall i have been a good spouse, and she has been wonderful helping me navigate these health issues I have had to deal with. The love, kindness, and supporthas been amazing. Whatever I need, she is there. I have long taken this woman for granted, and maybe to some extent she has taken me for granted. I feel terrible about this, if I lost her I would be forever lost. It should not take a health crisis or
We have had some rather bitter exchanges here, and for those I am deeply sorry. Especially about politics. I can't tell you how many relationships I have seen destroyed the last few years over politics and Covid. I left Facebook, tired of the argumentsand insults among people that used to get along so well. I have family, maybe some of you do too, that are blood and have tarnished relationships because of politics. What has sunk in with me is that both sides are equally bad. There are a few truly
I guess my message here is to take a deep breath with the New Year upon us, This is probably the deepest breath I have even taken. Realize what a gift it is to be alive, and what a gift it is to have your health. Not let little things break us apart,and build relationships and trust instead of doing the opposite. This is a very small community, very small. We are all smart decent people I am sure, although our online behavior does not always reflect it. Giving the fragility of life, given the
Please accept my heartfelt wishes to all of you for a great 2023. I truly wish all of you the best. Thanks for listening, a long post, I could not be more sincere and truly wish all of you nothing but joy, happiness, and health as we embark on a newyear.
On Saturday, December 31, 2022 at 8:51:47 AM UTC-8, Irving S wrote:bottom of my heart and a lot of stuff here is hard to say. Why am I doing this? Not for sympathy, not for attention, but there are a few things I need to say, it is therapeutic for me to say them and maybe something here will inspire you. And I am doing
This is a hard post for me to make, I have been really down the last few weeks. I mean really down, words cannot describe it. I know I have been beyond silly on a few posts and argumentative at times, as others have been too, but this is from the
disability for the first time in my life. I have been scared and deeply depressed. I have had several panic attacks. If you never had one, well just imagine waking up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat, heart pounding, and you feel like all isI always thought of myself as being invinceable, I think a lot of us do, but I have had some recent health issues that have been beyond scary to me. I have not worked since Thanksgiving week and probably will not return for another month. I am on
Every day really is a blessing, talking to a friend the other day, he said that "We are all time bombs". That time bomb could be cancer, a stroke, a heart attack, a car wreck, being hit by lightening, it could be anything. You really never know what isBeing away from work and being idle a lot, I have had time to reflect on a few things. First, I realized my own mortality, and really what a short time we have here. So many people close to us have died recently. Some it was expected, some it was not.
lot of underlying depression I have, and I have come to grips with it. I had an awful upbringing, and a fair amount of hurt and disappointment in my life, and maybe did not process it as well as I should. I think we all have some degrees of mental healthWith all this time to reflect, I realize that I have generally been a good person in this life, but flawed in many ways like all of us. I have generally been kind and caring, but at times not so much. I keep so busy, I mean really busy, it masks a
support has been amazing. Whatever I need, she is there. I have long taken this woman for granted, and maybe to some extent she has taken me for granted. I feel terrible about this, if I lost her I would be forever lost. It should not take a healthI am lucky to be married to an amazing lady. We will be together 29 years next month. I think overall i have been a good spouse, and she has been wonderful helping me navigate these health issues I have had to deal with. The love, kindness, and
arguments and insults among people that used to get along so well. I have family, maybe some of you do too, that are blood and have tarnished relationships because of politics. What has sunk in with me is that both sides are equally bad. There are a fewWe have had some rather bitter exchanges here, and for those I am deeply sorry. Especially about politics. I can't tell you how many relationships I have seen destroyed the last few years over politics and Covid. I left Facebook, tired of the
and build relationships and trust instead of doing the opposite. This is a very small community, very small. We are all smart decent people I am sure, although our online behavior does not always reflect it. Giving the fragility of life, given theI guess my message here is to take a deep breath with the New Year upon us, This is probably the deepest breath I have even taken. Realize what a gift it is to be alive, and what a gift it is to have your health. Not let little things break us apart,
year.Please accept my heartfelt wishes to all of you for a great 2023. I truly wish all of you the best. Thanks for listening, a long post, I could not be more sincere and truly wish all of you nothing but joy, happiness, and health as we embark on a new
Hi Irving,
I tried sending you a private email, but your old email address has been deactivated. Send me another email if you want to talk privately.
Tom
On Saturday, January 7, 2023 at 10:30:49 PM UTC-5, Tommy wrote:bottom of my heart and a lot of stuff here is hard to say. Why am I doing this? Not for sympathy, not for attention, but there are a few things I need to say, it is therapeutic for me to say them and maybe something here will inspire you. And I am doing
On Saturday, December 31, 2022 at 8:51:47 AM UTC-8, Irving S wrote:
This is a hard post for me to make, I have been really down the last few weeks. I mean really down, words cannot describe it. I know I have been beyond silly on a few posts and argumentative at times, as others have been too, but this is from the
disability for the first time in my life. I have been scared and deeply depressed. I have had several panic attacks. If you never had one, well just imagine waking up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat, heart pounding, and you feel like all isI always thought of myself as being invinceable, I think a lot of us do, but I have had some recent health issues that have been beyond scary to me. I have not worked since Thanksgiving week and probably will not return for another month. I am on
not. Every day really is a blessing, talking to a friend the other day, he said that "We are all time bombs". That time bomb could be cancer, a stroke, a heart attack, a car wreck, being hit by lightening, it could be anything. You really never know whatBeing away from work and being idle a lot, I have had time to reflect on a few things. First, I realized my own mortality, and really what a short time we have here. So many people close to us have died recently. Some it was expected, some it was
lot of underlying depression I have, and I have come to grips with it. I had an awful upbringing, and a fair amount of hurt and disappointment in my life, and maybe did not process it as well as I should. I think we all have some degrees of mental healthWith all this time to reflect, I realize that I have generally been a good person in this life, but flawed in many ways like all of us. I have generally been kind and caring, but at times not so much. I keep so busy, I mean really busy, it masks a
support has been amazing. Whatever I need, she is there. I have long taken this woman for granted, and maybe to some extent she has taken me for granted. I feel terrible about this, if I lost her I would be forever lost. It should not take a healthI am lucky to be married to an amazing lady. We will be together 29 years next month. I think overall i have been a good spouse, and she has been wonderful helping me navigate these health issues I have had to deal with. The love, kindness, and
arguments and insults among people that used to get along so well. I have family, maybe some of you do too, that are blood and have tarnished relationships because of politics. What has sunk in with me is that both sides are equally bad. There are a fewWe have had some rather bitter exchanges here, and for those I am deeply sorry. Especially about politics. I can't tell you how many relationships I have seen destroyed the last few years over politics and Covid. I left Facebook, tired of the
apart, and build relationships and trust instead of doing the opposite. This is a very small community, very small. We are all smart decent people I am sure, although our online behavior does not always reflect it. Giving the fragility of life, given theI guess my message here is to take a deep breath with the New Year upon us, This is probably the deepest breath I have even taken. Realize what a gift it is to be alive, and what a gift it is to have your health. Not let little things break us
new year.Please accept my heartfelt wishes to all of you for a great 2023. I truly wish all of you the best. Thanks for listening, a long post, I could not be more sincere and truly wish all of you nothing but joy, happiness, and health as we embark on a
just been one thing after another. I have lost 17 lbs in the last month, I am on some medicine that I hate, and my spirits have been beyond bleak. I never thought i would miss work and my co-workers so much. I have lost more than a bounce to my step,Hi Irving,
I tried sending you a private email, but your old email address has been deactivated. Send me another email if you want to talk privately.
TomI am sorry for that. I seem to have lost your email, if you want to give me an address we can talk privately.
I can tell you that life has not been good for me of late, and I am a very different person that even a few months ago. I needed some surgery almost out of the blue, and had to go through some pre-surgical testing, and other things came out, and it has
As I mentioned, with so much time on my hands just to sit and ponder, I truly have realized the fragility of our existence. So much sickness and death around me. One of our good friends recently passed after a 2 year bout with pancreatic cancer, weactually thought she had it beat. My sister in law is in hospice, with pulmonary fibrosis, and my brother in law, is now in a nursing home, he has Parkinson's and cannot stop falling. My best friend developed sepsis, ended up in ICU and vented twice,
I will put my chips on the table and honestly say I had some really negative thoughts about myself, but could never carry them out. That is not a solution, and the hurt to others, I could not imagine. I have accepted that good heath is not a guarantee,but how we process health issues can affect outcomes, so I am now working to be positive. I am lucky to have family and friends that are so supportive. I have come to realize that very sadly, there must be many people out there with hosts of phyiscal and
We come to these forums, we go back and forth, we all try to posture and make ourselves be right and the others wrong, we exchange insults, we act like idiots at times, for what? In the end, these issues are totally unimportant, and all this posturingis unimportant. It is meaningless. The only thing that matters to me going forward is being a positive person, spreading joy to those important in my life. Being right and coming on top of arguments whether it be on line or in person means nothing in the
Sorry if I rambled on, it is certainly good for me to say all these things, and I have shared these feelings with friends and family. Growth comes from good times, but also from bad times. That is really my message here, . we hope for the best in ourlives, and the same for our friends and loved ones, but sometimes things just don't go the way we hope. Be there for people, really be there. You might think you don't have the time, oh yes you do. Sadly, it could be you in that same place a month from
Again, all the best to you Tommy and all those here! Hope everyone has a great day!
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