Hiya.

Thanks for the love, all of you that remain, all of you that are gone.

I'm ready to resume my love for hip-hop, though I DJ psytrance these days.

And yes, I did 8 years, 8 months in federal lockup. And yes, I did go to the hole in Leavenworth for inciting a riot.

No, I'm not sorry for what I did, what I might have done, and what I could have have done. None of it mattered, none of it was why I went down. I went down because I was a fall guy, a convenient one. I did at one point distribute LSD for a few years, so
I knew people the government wanted, but at the time I was taken down, hadn't been in active distribution for over a year, and almost 2 years since I would distribute beyond 1 or 2 people I owed my life to.

I certainly didn't conspire with anyone to distribute LSD. I did an insane amount of LSD, had a solid connect, and people that wouldn't leave me alone --
they wanted my drugs. As I've said on panels asking why people become drug dealers, "look in the mirror, I became one, because of that person not leaving me alone, how long do you think I would hold out, telling you 'no'? Being the asshole? Being that
fucked up guy that won't share? I didn't last a weekend."

That being said, yes, I did a lot of drugs back in the day. I was a well informed drug user. And whether you want to believe or not, it was much better that I did drugs, than be what I was groomed to be.

I was groomed to be a righteous enforcer, military, police, violent to the core, justified for the state. Had I not deviated from drug use, I could have spent my lifetime with my only happiness coming from hurting brown people with some flimsy
justification handed from superiors, thus removing any personal accountability to the brutality I was raised to inflict on others.

I stop fighting people wanting my LSD, for the same reason I was doing it: it freed me from the life of misery I was embarking on, conditioned since birth through seemingly endless violence, taking away my humanity, scarring my emotions permanently,
making my a nonfunctional human being. LSD showed me another way, and began my path of atonement for what I'd been molded into. You wouldn't want it any other way, because the other way, was to remain the vicious monster I was prior to 15, when I hurt
people, almost killed several, violent to the core, and only felt like I was connected to someone, if they were dying and in complete terror. So, moving on...

On 9/11/2001, I remember where I was when the "attack on freedom" occurred -- I was in prison, doing a ten year bid, for a thoughtcrime. So when Bush Jr. asked, I thought hard about my life up until that point, and it was hip-hop that had an answer...
more on that later.

I graduated college while in prison, first a 2 year, then a 4 year program based out of Ohio University's College Program for the Incarcerated.

I had 2 dogs while locked up, one got killed by accident, I had to snap her neck myself, because the fucked up cowards who "borrowed" her brought her mangled beyond repair at prison dairy farm body back to me with their empty apologies didn't have the
stomach to do the right thing - either when they "borrowed" her without asking, or when they brought her broken body back to me. I cried as I buried her, and my hatred for ignorance grew. My second dog was killed intentionally, because I wouldn't
tolerate snitches on the crew, and could sniff (no pun intended) them out with alarming accuracy, and without consciously doing it. Snitches had some kind of nonverbal nonlinguistic cues that I'm heavily tuned into, so I'd naturally pull away from them,
find them repulsive. My 2nd dog was killed after I left. When I defeated my supervised release term of 5 years, after 14 months, I came for her, but she had been dead over a year. The coward that did it got his jaw broke... so there was nothing left for
me to do, except take the loss and call my prisonlife over completely.

I worked at a prison dairy farm for almost 5 years. I made and sold ice cream in the greymarket of prison camp economics. Because I hated the bigots, my ice cream had to be ordered by name, spoken out loud, which included "I like my chocolate like my
women, bitter, strong, and BLACK!" "DeezNutz" "DeezNutzR4MyMochaGirlz" "The Best Chocolate is as Black as my Women" "MochaLikeMyWoman" Yes, the names were stupid, but so were the KKK and homophobes, and I had to tolerate both, while they wanted my ice
cream.

This was after 2 years and change in an INS (now ICE) hold, because they hated a letter I wrote FunkyStyle, which bounced back when Funky moved to a different address. They opened and read it, and called me in for questioning, as my letter accused them
of being fascist pigs. I didn't capitulate as they wanted in this interrogation, at which point, my mouth got me kicked out of the "nice" prison camp at Nellis Air Force Base, Nevada. It was hell on earth, so I didn't mind being booted and put into an
FCI at Lompoc, California (a higher security level institution), that was also an INS hold where undocumented people with brown skin for the most part, were rubber stamped to be deported after they served their prison time.

I got to meet and become good friends with Larry Leyton, of the People's Temple fame, and Nicholas Sands, whom died this year, and was a mentor to me. I also freestyle battled just about anyone who was interested. #1 question asked of me in prison: what
the fuck are you doing here? I didn't care about money, didn't care about status, just loved my hip-hop, and became a jailhouse lawyer to make money at first, but became invested in the cause of justice generally.

Since getting out in 2008, I've been at the Drug Policy Alliance, working on Drug Law Reform, left to go to law school, didn't fit, they booted me for not participating in their systemic racism, which they got called out for the non-racial portion of in
2011 -- "How Law Schools are Gaming Law Students" in the New York Times -- it just didn't include the racial analysis that I had, but I went to school with the students being fucked over, and they were almost all minorities, and me, the ex-con. I tried
graduate management school, didn't fit. Been working as a paralegal and legal research assistant.

Got all nostalgic for some reason, missed the old days, and spotted this place in looking over my old life. I don't identify as Alex Carlton anymore, Carlton was biopops, fuck that piece of shit, took my mother's last name, and my assumed name Malakkar,
which I used on-and-off prior to prison. While I got my name changed legally in prison, Bureau of Prisons didn't want to recognize it, so funnily enough, I have a clean record, despite going to prison as a drug cartel overlord... in thought, not in deed.
Wasn't convicted of actually doing anything, just of agreeing to distribute LSD in some fucked up place in Iowa, maybe Des Moines, Ames, or some other place, I don't really know, been to Iowa only once before my trial, to try and get a friend to move
back to California.

I
Outta
Went
Around

the stupid fucking state of Iowa. So should have my friend. Que sera, sera. No offense meant, Flash, that state has a lot of bad mileage with me... and only you to counter-balance it.

Since getting out, I haven't had a lot of influence or direction or even knowledge of hip-hop, due to continually despising television, a lifelong dislike, no radio, uh, does radio even exist anymore?

Found random stuff I like -- Infedellix (sp?), Dead Prez, Libretto, Talib Kweli, Immortal Technique, Mr. Lif, Busdriver, Royce da 5'9" when I'm feeling gangsta rap again, like I was bringing LA 1990's back. And of course I have a signed copy of the vinyl
release of Blackalicious's New Album... so I'm not really coastal if that's even a thing anymore, somehow I doubt it.

I'm too old to freestyle, I can't stand SoldierBoy, or anything overly AudioTuned like Lil' Jon, I'm not judging people who do, but I am looking for re-immersion into hip-hop, because while I love Psytrance, and most non-house-ey electronica below 140bpm,
I'm missing something, and I know it in my heart -- I'm missing dope beats, and incredible lyricism... which trance will not offer me, because it's a limitation of the genre, just like hip-hop will not give a 35 minute opus with the same beat signature,
from the same artist. I'm not judging, I'm just accepting genre boundaries, and explaining why my life is missing something, and why I believe some of you can help.

So, I'm back. I live near L.A. I don't break the law anymore, I've done enough time for one life -- so no, I don't know anyone who has or makes any drugs, and can only answer policy and legal questions about drugs, and don't give legal opinions, because
I'm not a liar, err.. lawyer.

I don't want to know anyone who has any drugs, I don't want any drugs, hell weed is legal and I can't stand the shit anyways, been allergic since 16... and I don't even want proximity to any drugs -- it's too dangerous, in my book. If that makes me a
sellout, so fucking be it, I sold out. I don't want to do any more time.

This stance is subject to change, if I get a sufficient CRISPR treatment to cure myself of the various maladies I have, and cure my limited time left alive on this earth... so far, no offers, no CRISPR treatment solution, so no change in stance, them's
the breaks. With a longer perspective a CRISPR-enhanced lifetime will allow, I might consider some things worth spending more time in prison for.

I tend to wax long, as usual.

I don't tend to beat people with my words anymore, I'm a little more concerned with systems and not with individuals. I was on my way prior to prison, hence my love for Tha Coup, despite Mike Burke saying they were lame for their Parliament Funk Beat
usage. If you're still around Mike, admit your mistake, Tha Coup has been dope since 1992's "Kill My Landlord" album broke -- it'll soothe your heart, and put it in the right place finally.

No offense meant to anyone lovin' personal beef, but the bigger picture captured me, and showed me that my petty interpersonal beefs...? --Well, Mos Def covered it already when he discussed what's beef while part of BlackStarr with Talib Kweli -- "Beef
is a long jail sentence, handed down to you in a short few minutes... Beef is oil prices, and geopolitics, Beef is Iraq, West Bank, and Gaza Strip."

Malakkar Vohryzek
"Told the streets were paved with gold,
Whoever paved that shit, got minimum wage too."
Quote Courtesy Boots O'Riley from Tha Coup

P.S. Shouts out to, fuck me this list ain't going to be long enough, and not enough respect or love shown, nahmean?

--Steve "Flash" Juon (The only thing I've ever known worth half a fuck coming out of Iowa, but he almost makes up for the entire state being wack),

FunkyStyle (sorry about losing you while in la pinche pinta),

DJ Fatboy Roberts (Hard to the yard fool, I know you threw down some words backing me back in the day, appreciate it),

B. David Harrison (no I don't hate on you, despite your assumptions about me, most were wrong),

OverTiME, Buggzy, Alan Dickison (probably spelled that wrong),

High-C (Louisiana Whiteboy way ahead of Eminem, just didn't have same production crew),

DisOrganized, Mike Burke, Dodd, KingBassT, Tony1er,
'Just my opinion' fuckforgothisname, Wuz the Flemish dude (sorry I flailed while in Europe, didn't make Rotterdam like I was supposed to), and the 60+ people who I'm not naming here, cuz I'm getting crusty with age. Missed ya'all.

Anyone buying a piece of the Faggotville Estate -- I hope I did you right, I tried. I also converted the entire estate into MP3 and burned to CDs, but might not have mentioned that bit. What can I say? I saw the MP3 revolution coming, and figured by the
time I got out, they'd still be relevant. Whoah boy I was right, so in essence, you helped bankroll my lawyer, while I shamefully pirated like a person going to prison for a ten piece. Wait, I was going to prison for a ten piece. I'm not saying it makes
it okay, just understandable, right?

1 callout: Akiem Allah--the only exception I'm making--so feel special, I guess. Why? You once fronted like I'd be intimidated by you. After 2000, you knew you were full of shit. No one could break me. Not even the feds trying for life. That makes your
2003 sideswipe while I was imprisoned, despicable coward shit. Hey, maybe in 14 years, you've graduated from the lowest form of life--punching down on a prisoner. I'm won't take that bet, but I'll give you the benefit of the doubt: admit it, apologize
for it, and let's move on. Or not, I don't especially care about you, just the punching down on prisoners, cuz it's truly some pathetic cowardly shit.

--- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05
* Origin: fsxNet Usenet Gateway (21:1/5)

Sheeeeit, looks like spammed kill any discussion by real people.

I wonder what online sharing and posting place became the new spot?

Maybe no new spot, back to the darkness, no new hiphop without some hard work...

--- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05
* Origin: fsxNet Usenet Gateway (21:1/5)