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  • Funny ways to answer the phone

    From jamesedwardcollier@gmail.com@21:1/5 to Rick Powell on Wed Dec 4 14:00:08 2019
    On Sunday, April 28, 1996 at 2:00:00 AM UTC-5, Rick Powell wrote:
    I have a little habit of funyn ways to answer phones but I am
    running dry since I know only 4:
    House of the lord, god speaking
    Joe's creamatorium you kill 'em we grill 'em
    Joe's taxidermy you snuff 'em we stuff 'em
    Bonjurrrrrr ye cheese eatin surrendur monkey!
    (Watch the Simpsons for the last 3)
    Please post some original ones.

    Akbar's Snackbar
    First Third Bank on Fourth and Fifth, Juan Drew Thirsten Ford speaking
    Phil's unusually sourced pig meat

    --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05
    * Origin: fsxNet Usenet Gateway (21:1/5)
  • From shaydenhooper9@gmail.com@21:1/5 to All on Sat Jan 11 23:06:29 2020
    Child safety you make them we take them

    --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05
    * Origin: fsxNet Usenet Gateway (21:1/5)
  • From someonebetterxv@gmail.com@21:1/5 to All on Thu Mar 12 21:53:15 2020
    I go with "Joe's Morgue, you stab 'em we slab 'em!"

    Or I'll say "Bob's sperm bank, you squeeze it, we freeze it!"

    --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05
    * Origin: fsxNet Usenet Gateway (21:1/5)
  • From mirandac5384@gmail.com@21:1/5 to All on Sat Mar 28 15:23:56 2020
    Hello, this is your local spirm doner, u jack it we pack it

    --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05
    * Origin: fsxNet Usenet Gateway (21:1/5)
  • From soccerstar123097@gmail.com@21:1/5 to Rick Powell on Tue Apr 14 21:32:50 2020
    On Sunday, April 28, 1996 at 3:00:00 AM UTC-4, Rick Powell wrote:
    I have a little habit of funyn ways to answer phones but I am
    running dry since I know only 4:
    House of the lord, god speaking
    Joe's creamatorium you kill 'em we grill 'em
    Joe's taxidermy you snuff 'em we stuff 'em
    Bonjurrrrrr ye cheese eatin surrendur monkey!
    (Watch the Simpsons for the last 3)
    Please post some original ones.

    I haven't found many that work like this one but its my favorite.

    *in a German accent*

    Thank you for calling the German Coast Guard, what are you sinking about?

    --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05
    * Origin: fsxNet Usenet Gateway (21:1/5)
  • From dannigilbert721@gmail.com@21:1/5 to All on Fri Jun 19 19:04:14 2020
    (thick Indian accent) "hello. And thank you for calling customer support. My name is Hadib. How may I help you today?"

    --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05
    * Origin: fsxNet Usenet Gateway (21:1/5)
  • From milo0transgender@gmail.com@21:1/5 to All on Tue Jun 30 15:25:41 2020
    I normally say "Your calling Gore's abortion clinic and pizza place where yesterday's loss is today's sauce how may we help you."

    --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05
    * Origin: fsxNet Usenet Gateway (21:1/5)
  • From James Walker@21:1/5 to Bill Clinton on Mon Jul 20 08:30:55 2020
    On Tuesday, April 30, 1996 at 2:00:00 AM UTC-5, Bill Clinton wrote:
    Planned Parenthood, you rape 'em, we scrape 'em, no fetus can beat us!
    "Joe sidewalks we keep you off the streets."

    --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05
    * Origin: fsxNet Usenet Gateway (21:1/5)
  • From Jean-Pierre Emond@21:1/5 to Rick Powell on Fri Sep 4 09:55:55 2020
    On Sunday, 28 April 1996 at 03:00:00 UTC-4, Rick Powell wrote:
    I have a little habit of funyn ways to answer phones but I am
    running dry since I know only 4:
    House of the lord, god speaking
    Joe's creamatorium you kill 'em we grill 'em
    Joe's taxidermy you snuff 'em we stuff 'em
    Bonjurrrrrr ye cheese eatin surrendur monkey!
    (Watch the Simpsons for the last 3)
    Please post some original ones.
    House of God, Jesus speaking.

    --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05
    * Origin: fsxNet Usenet Gateway (21:1/5)
  • From Gralber@grelberville.org@21:1/5 to jeanpierreemond010888@gmail.com on Tue Sep 8 17:25:21 2020
    On Fri, 4 Sep 2020 09:55:55 -0700 (PDT), Jean-Pierre Emond <jeanpierreemond010888@gmail.com> wrote:

    On Sunday, 28 April 1996 at 03:00:00 UTC-4, Rick Powell wrote:
    I have a little habit of funyn ways to answer phones but I am
    running dry since I know only 4:
    House of the lord, god speaking
    Joe's creamatorium you kill 'em we grill 'em
    Joe's taxidermy you snuff 'em we stuff 'em
    Bonjurrrrrr ye cheese eatin surrendur monkey!
    (Watch the Simpsons for the last 3)
    Please post some original ones.
    House of God, Jesus speaking.
    House of Lords, God speaking...

    --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05
    * Origin: fsxNet Usenet Gateway (21:1/5)
  • From Allison@21:1/5 to All on Fri Nov 13 16:15:48 2020
    Abortion Pizzeria...where yesterday's loss is today's sauce. Can I interest you in one of our personal placenta pies? :)

    --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05
    * Origin: fsxNet Usenet Gateway (21:1/5)
  • From Edwina Moody@21:1/5 to All on Thu Aug 4 14:42:19 2022
    Kelly's Pool Hall, Eight Ball speaking.

    --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05
    * Origin: fsxNet Usenet Gateway (21:1/5)