XPost: rec.arts.tv, alt.support.wheelchairs

Some things are better left unsaid. Even though they may be well-
intentioned, certain curious questions and comments can do more harm
than good. But a new CBC digital series aims to take some of those
questions to the people who can set the record straight on certain
stereotypes. You Can't Ask That, now streaming on CBC Gem, offers
illuminating perspectives of Canadians living with different
disabilities, posing them anonymous online questions and getting their
raw, unscripted answers. The first episode, profiling wheelchair users,
is an unfiltered discussion of the pros and cons of living dynamic and
diverse lives — here's a taste of what it covers.

"Why are you in a wheelchair?"

The opening question instantly shows just how varied life in a
wheelchair can be. Among the 8 subjects interviewed, the causes of
their disability are drastically different. Paul Tshuma has a
congenital condition, Maayan Ziv was born with muscular dystrophy,
Andrew Gurza has cerebral palsy and Woody Belfort has another form of
cerebral palsy known as spastic displasia. Peter McGregor was in a
multi-car collision as a child, Russell Winkelaar was struck by a drunk
driver and Juliet Davies had a bicycle fall. Bean Gill was suddenly
paralyzed due to a virus on vacation in Vegas. Each person has different-functioning wheelchairs, unique abilities using their
wheelchairs and different relationships to them. Using a wheelchair
from birth creates a vastly different experience than having to
suddenly adjust to using one at the age of 8, 30 or 60. The episode
also pairs some of the subjects together to share how limiting
stereotypes can impact their vibrant lives.

"What are the perks of life in a wheelchair?"

Every situation comes with advantages and disadvantages and impatient line-waiters can't help but ask, "do you use your wheelchair to skip
lines?" And here, the dichotomy is revealed as Ziv shared some mixed
feelings about both wanting to be treated equally and also taking
opportunities presented. Davies notes that even though she doesn't skip
lines elsewhere, boarding an airplane first is great, while Belfort has
a whole line-skipping strategy (of subtly nudging the person ahead of
him causing a domino effect to the front), and Gill even admits it's
nice to "get hot guys to carry you around when there's stairs."
Winkelaar perhaps puts it most succinctly, "There are not a lot of
perks (to wheelchair use), so I'll take the stupid little ones when I
get them."

"Can you shower yourself?"

It's quite a common question, Ziv says, and she's befuddled by why
people find it so fascinating, she certainly doesn't wonder the same
about the people she meets. But there's a genuine curiosity, even
between the subjects of the show. There are a variety of ways each
showers — whether completely on their own, with the assistance of a
shower chair, or requiring the help of an attendant. But the question
itself speaks to a stigma, that such hygiene is somehow less important
to wheelchair users, when the opposite is true. In actuality, because
it requires more time, effort and planning, hygiene is perhaps even
more of a priority since it's not something that could be done
carelessly. "I'm jealous of everyone that takes a 5 minute shower in
the morning,'' says Winelaar.

"Do you care if people use the disabled toilet?"

Similar to showering, wheelchair users have a variety of needs while
going to the bathroom, all of which are completely ignored by anyone
else who uses the disabled toilet without reason. The subjects are
unanimous on how ignorant this is (not to mention annoying and
frustrating), because they can't overstate the importance of being able
to use it. If you think you're free to use the disabled toilet because
no one else is around, Gill gives a stark reality check, explaining
that her urge to use the bathroom can come suddenly, leaving her
minimal time to get there, so it's of the essence that one is
available. Juliet, an avid swimmer, shares her irritation when she sees
people using the disabled stall to change their clothes, rather than
using the changeroom. The extra space in the stall is a necessity for
those who need it and, considering the limited number of public
disabled toilets, keeping them open is more than just a courtesy.

https://www.facebook.com/CBClife/videos/923550527986219/

"Does the wheelchair ruin romance?"

When curiosity wanders behind closed doors, a positive and productive
mindset emerges. Gurza is an advocate for disability and sexuality and
is quick to explain that wheelchairs don't ruin romance, but they do
present different challenges. In the dating game, some may view the
wheelchair as a barrier, being intimidated or even afraid of it, but
Ziv says that's probably not the type of person you'd want to be
romantic with in the first place. In that sense, the wheelchair can act
as a filter, helping to weed out less open-minded partners.
Nevertheless, this stigma can still run deep, even among users, as Gill
admits one of her first thoughts when transitioning to wheelchair use
was wondering who would date someone in her situation. But Gill's
eventual revelation is this: not only for romance but on the whole —
her wheelchair is not her, nor does it define her. Wheelchairs are
simply an extension of who someone is, and there is a spirited, complex
and full life behind each one.

You Can't Ask That also offers honest and inspiring profiles on Down
syndrome, blind/visually impaired, short statured, facial differences, amputees, Tourette syndrome and autism spectrum disorder, all available
now on CBC Gem.

--
Watching Democrats come up with schemes to "catch Trump" is like
watching Wile E. Coyote trying to catch Road Runner.

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