You all probably know my opinion on remakes of classic video-games,
but just in case you've managed to avoid all my posts on the subject,*
I'm not a fan. I find them lazy cash-ins that don't add anything new
to the original and usually lack the fun and novelty of the game they
are aping. I'd much rather a sequel or - better yet - an entirely new
IP. So you can imagine the lack of excitement when I read that Roberta
and Ken Williams** were working on a new graphical version of
"Colossal Cave"***, the first adventure game ever made.
It's not that I don't like "Colossal Cave". For its time it was an
absolutely exciting game; it may be hard to imagine today, but - back
when the handful of computer games - "Space Invaders", "Pac Man",
"Pong", etc. were locked to tiny, fanciful arenas - "Colossal Cave
seemed massive in scope and more real than anything ever output onto a video-terminal. Imagine jumping from "Wolfenstein 3D" directly to
"Grand Theft Auto V" and you may get an idea of how revelatory that
game felt in comparison to its peers.
I was a huge fan of the Williams' works too. Their adventure games
were masterpieces of software design, pushing the hardware further
than ever I thought possible with each iteration of their long-running
games. More than once I booted up a "Kings Quest" game and thought to
myself, "We'll never see graphics better than this," only to be proven
wrong in a year or two. And - while not without their flaws - the
games were imaginative and fun too. In an era when each video-game
purchase had to be weighed and measured beforehand, Sierra titles were
always an instant buy.
So you'd think I'd take news of their return to the gaming industry
with a lighter heart. Yet it is anything but.
It didn't help that the husband-wife team - in the later years prior
to their departure from Sierra - were already proving themselves to be behind-the-curve when it came to development. They were slow to pick
up on 3D-technologies as the next revolution in gaming, and their game
design had lagged behind market trends for years. While the likes of
LucasArts and Id and Cyan and Valve were introducing new concepts to
gaming, the Williams were still churning out the same illogical-puzzle family-safe video-games that had been their bread-n-butter for twenty
years prior.
When they did branch out, they tended to chase the latest fad
(remember the FMV phase of Sierra, with "Phantasmagoria" and "Urban
Runner"?). They were already heavily dependent on nostalgia keeping
their brands afloat back in 1999, and there's no evidence that they've
learned anything new since then. Then, add the historically bad record
of old-school designers trying to make a comeback - yeah, I'm looking
at you, Richard Garriot and Chris Roberts, but there are others too -
and the odds of the Williams' success seems even less likely.
And "Colossal Cave"? A fantastic game for its time... but - even with
a modern 3D graphical remake - it's hardly the sort of game that will
enthrall a modern audience. It's slow, with fairly dull level design
and unexciting puzzles and - even a few years after its release - it
was quickly surpassed by its far-better successors - the "Zorks" and
"Hackers" and "Wonderlands" made by the wunderkinds at Infocom,
Legend, Magnetic Scrolls and Adventure International.
Perhaps I'm being too negative? I'd like to think so... and then I saw
their preview video and my heart dropped again. THIS is the teaser -
the "best of what we got" video - that they intend to excite the fans
with? I know it's early yet and presumably (?) the visuals will
improve, but I've seen better graphics in a twenty-year old game.
Lacking the association with the Williams or the pioneer adventure,
the game would sink like a stone, ridiculed for its awful production
values and (if true to the original) terrible gameplay. And even with
the Williams' names connected, I've no confidence it will do any
better.
It's not that I don't want the like of Roberta and Ken Williams to
keep making games. I think they probably still have the potential to
bring us some exciting new properties. But it's been more than twenty
years since they've created anything worthwhile, and there's no
evidence they've the chops to head up a even a relatively small
project like this.
That they are the headline of the story smacks more of ego (and
salesmanship) than value, and I find that objectionable. It feels
predatory and manipulative, all the more since their preview reel does
anything but assure me they've still got the talent to create a
palatable game.
Well, we'll see if I'm just being a grumpy old cynic. Honestly, I'd be
happy to be proven wrong. But I can't help but feel that this game is
going to be a colossal mess, and the people who pay their hard-earned
money are going to feel conned and disappointed. Only time will tell,
I guess.
-------------------
* in which case, why are you reading this one? ;-)
** I only mentioned the distaff partner in the subject because a) I
felt she was the more recognizable name, and b) adding Ken made the
subject line too long ;-)
***
https://www.colossalcave3d.com/
****
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qpHj186rMX4
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