• Re: Software Precepts

    From Retrograde@21:1/5 to Ben Collver on Wed Mar 20 21:53:17 2024
    On 2024-03-20, Ben Collver <bencollver@tilde.pink> wrote:
    Software Precepts
    =================
    * Specifications are for the weak and timid!
    * You question the worthiness of my code? I should kill you where you
    stand!
    * Indentation?! - I will show you how to indent when I indent your
    skull!
    * What is this talk of 'release'? We do not make software
    'releases'. Our software 'escapes' leaving a bloody trail of
    designers and quality assurance people in its wake.
    * Our function calls do not have 'parameters' - they have 'arguments'
    - and they ALWAYS WIN THEM.
    * Debugging? We do not debug. Our software does not coddle the weak.
    * A TRUE programmer does not comment on their code!
    * Our software does NOT have BUGS. It has FEATURES, and those
    features are too sophisticated for one such as you to understand.
    * Our users will know fear and cower before our software! Ship it!
    Ship it and let them flee like the dogs they are!
    Based on: <https://afni.nimh.nih.gov/precepts>

    I saw on Slashdot once: "I refuse to comment code. It was hard to write,
    it should be hard to read." LOL.

    This was fun, very good stuff. Especially software "escaping."

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  • From Ben Collver@21:1/5 to All on Wed Mar 20 21:35:50 2024
    Software Precepts
    =================
    * Specifications are for the weak and timid!

    * You question the worthiness of my code? I should kill you where you
    stand!

    * Indentation?! - I will show you how to indent when I indent your
    skull!

    * What is this talk of 'release'? We do not make software
    'releases'. Our software 'escapes' leaving a bloody trail of
    designers and quality assurance people in its wake.

    * Our function calls do not have 'parameters' - they have 'arguments'
    - and they ALWAYS WIN THEM.

    * Debugging? We do not debug. Our software does not coddle the weak.

    * A TRUE programmer does not comment on their code!

    * Our software does NOT have BUGS. It has FEATURES, and those
    features are too sophisticated for one such as you to understand.

    * Our users will know fear and cower before our software! Ship it!
    Ship it and let them flee like the dogs they are!

    Based on: <https://afni.nimh.nih.gov/precepts>

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  • From John@21:1/5 to Ben Collver on Wed Mar 20 22:48:22 2024
    Ben Collver <bencollver@tilde.pink> writes:

    Software Precepts
    =================
    * Specifications are for the weak and timid!

    * You question the worthiness of my code? I should kill you where you
    stand!

    * Indentation?! - I will show you how to indent when I indent your
    skull!

    * What is this talk of 'release'? We do not make software
    'releases'. Our software 'escapes' leaving a bloody trail of
    designers and quality assurance people in its wake.

    * Our function calls do not have 'parameters' - they have 'arguments'
    - and they ALWAYS WIN THEM.

    * Debugging? We do not debug. Our software does not coddle the weak.

    * A TRUE programmer does not comment on their code!

    * Our software does NOT have BUGS. It has FEATURES, and those
    features are too sophisticated for one such as you to understand.

    * Our users will know fear and cower before our software! Ship it!
    Ship it and let them flee like the dogs they are!

    Based on: <https://afni.nimh.nih.gov/precepts>

    "Based on" meaning you just stripped out the references to Klingons and Romulans and called it a day?

    Like, it seemed pretty good as they originally wrote it, and the Klingon references give it more context.


    john

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  • From Johanne Fairchild@21:1/5 to Ben Collver on Wed Mar 20 19:55:09 2024
    Ben Collver <bencollver@tilde.pink> writes:

    [...]

    Based on: <https://afni.nimh.nih.gov/precepts>

    Is the government makes jokes like that? Omg, that's so cool!

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  • From Ben Collver@21:1/5 to John on Wed Mar 20 23:06:06 2024
    On 2024-03-20, John <john@building-m.simplistic-anti-spam-measure.net> wrote:
    Ben Collver <bencollver@tilde.pink> writes:
    Based on: <https://afni.nimh.nih.gov/precepts>

    "Based on" meaning you just stripped out the references to Klingons and Romulans and called it a day?

    Yup!

    -Ben

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  • From candycanearter07@21:1/5 to Ben Collver on Thu Mar 21 14:50:08 2024
    Ben Collver <bencollver@tilde.pink> wrote at 21:35 this Wednesday (GMT):
    Software Precepts
    =================
    * Specifications are for the weak and timid!

    * You question the worthiness of my code? I should kill you where you
    stand!

    * Indentation?! - I will show you how to indent when I indent your
    skull!

    * What is this talk of 'release'? We do not make software
    'releases'. Our software 'escapes' leaving a bloody trail of
    designers and quality assurance people in its wake.

    * Our function calls do not have 'parameters' - they have 'arguments'
    - and they ALWAYS WIN THEM.

    * Debugging? We do not debug. Our software does not coddle the weak.

    * A TRUE programmer does not comment on their code!

    * Our software does NOT have BUGS. It has FEATURES, and those
    features are too sophisticated for one such as you to understand.

    * Our users will know fear and cower before our software! Ship it!
    Ship it and let them flee like the dogs they are!

    Based on: <https://afni.nimh.nih.gov/precepts>


    I love "bad coding advice" stuff like this. The grug-brained developer
    guide comes to mind here.
    --
    user <candycane> is generated from /dev/urandom

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  • From Lawrence D'Oliveiro@21:1/5 to Ben Collver on Fri Mar 29 05:46:57 2024
    On Wed, 20 Mar 2024 21:35:50 -0000 (UTC), Ben Collver wrote:

    * Our function calls do not have 'parameters' - they have 'arguments'

    The way I look at it, a “parameter” is any value that can be adjusted in
    an algorithm to solve a different problem in the same general class of problems.

    An “argument” is a “parameter” that is passed to a function at the point
    of the call. So different calls can be passed different values of this “parameter”.

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