• Amish Sysops

    From Lee Lofaso@2:203/2 to All on Wed May 15 01:08:59 2019
    Hello Everybody,

    I just found out that FidoNet may have a problem.
    Maybe not a major problem, but a problem nonetheless.
    And what is the problem? Amish sysops.

    Please. Let me remind you. This may be a problem.
    I never said it is a problem. Only it could be.

    Depending on when and if FidoNet ever gets Amish sysops.
    Just one Amish sysop would probably be okay, but more than
    one might present a unique problem.

    Most Amish speak three languages. But not all.
    Some Amish speak only two languages. And a few Amish
    speak only the one language in their own community.

    FidoNet has an unofficial standard of English as
    a common language for all. But not all Amish speak
    English. And almost nobody outside their own Amish
    communities speak their language.

    The three languages spoken by Amish are -

    English
    Pennsylvania Dutch
    Swiss-Amish

    Amish who speak English would have no problem in FidoNet.
    Although to be fair, Amish are very shy and tend to keep to
    themselves, rather than communicate with the outside world.

    Amish who speak Pennsylvania Dutch would never get along
    with those who speak Dutch, as these Amish are of German
    descent. Germans from the middle ages might understand
    them, but nobody else (aside from Amish who speak it).

    Pennsylvania Amish and Indiana Amish do not understand
    each other, since Indiana Amish are of Swiss descent rather
    than German descent. Two different languages. Since most
    Amish never leave their own community, they have no need
    to learn any other language than the one they speak.

    Which is why most Amish speak three languages.

    I did say most (a small handful are converts).

    A language barrier occurs when Pennsylvania Amish get
    together with Indiana Amish. Since neither side speaks
    English, both are lost and confused when it comes to
    FidoNet. Not really sure how they could work things out,
    especially since they tend to use pencil and paper rather
    than newfangled devices such as computers.

    These are folks who have at most an eighth grade education.
    Women never cut their hair. And men never cut their beards.
    But no man ever has a mustache, as nobody in the Bible had
    one.

    The Amish have two rules in life -

    * To cut one's own hair is a crime.
    * To cut someone else's hair is a hate crime.

    Sampson never cut his own hair.
    Delilah did the unspeakable evil.

    The Amish remember Samuel Mullet and his hair cutting spree.
    The horror those unsuspecting Amish men had to endure ...

    This is the reason why Amish are exempt from the military.
    Their belief in "non-resistance" has set them free!

    Jesus had long hair, and no mustache, setting the ultimate example.

    --Lee

    --
    Your Hole Is Our Goal

    --- MesNews/1.08.05.00-gb
    * Origin: news://eljaco.se (2:203/2)